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Jewish World Review May 20, 2014 / 20 Iyar, 5774 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
• New York's Taxi Commission suspended a cab driver thirty days for wearing a swastika armband on his left arm while on duty. He said he wore it months before someone reported it. If this doesn't result in an ordinance against texting while walking in New York, nothing will.
• The NFL is set to reduce the penalty against NFL players for smoking pot. What about the consequences? Being high could so reduce crimes of violence by NFL players that the trial lawyers would have to lobby states to criminalize driving too slowly to make up for lost revenue.
• NFL star Aaron Hernandez was indicted for a double murder which happened two years ago in Boston. He now faces three separate murder charges. O.J. Simpson tried to be a good sport about the news and issued a statement saying that all records were made to be broken.
• The NAACP hosted a luncheon Friday for the sixtieth anniversary of the Supreme Court's Brown vs.Topeka Board of Education ruling ending the legal segregation of schools. It was a time when black schools and white schools began each day with a prayer and the Pledge of Allegiance to the U.S. flag. The entire ritual was a direct slap at our nation's Hispanic heritage.
• President Obama's job approval rating was battered by the Benghazi probe and the IRS scandal. It's up and down. The bad news is, Obama's critics are starting to compare him to President Nixon, but the good news is they are no longer comparing him to President Carter.
• The Miami Dolphins put safety Don Jones in sensitivity training for a politically incorrect tweet Monday. It never ends. To save time Miami will hold summer training camp in Ho Chi Minh City and avoid the nine thousand mile flight between the practice field and the lecture hall.
• Time magazine saluted Joe Biden by listing his top ten onstage gaffes Thursday. We love his knack for saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. The new Joe Biden Vice Presidential Library in Delaware is four stories high, but in Joe's honor the elevator doesn't go all the way to the top.
• President Obama opened the World Trade Center attack museum in N.Y. Thursday. The speakers were careful not to mention radical Islam or offend any groups. Twelve years ago George Bush said the terrorists hate us for our freedoms, which should be a mild dislike by now.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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