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Jewish World Review May 21, 2013 / 12 Sivan, 5773 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
• New York's disgraced former Congressman Anthony Weiner disclosed Thursday that he still hasn't decided whether or not he'll run for Mayor of New York. His entry would make it a three-man race. Local racetrack bookies suggest that you bet on Weiner to show.
• O.J. Simpson was in court Friday seeking a retrial of his robbery conviction in Las Vegas four years ago. It's a point of honor. O.J. Simpson is tired of being considered a thief, a burglar and a kidnapper and he wants to be recognized as the world class murderer he is.
• The Chicago Bulls were eliminated by the Miami Heat in the NBA playoffs Thursday in a brutal series between the two physical teams. The Bulls are the president's favorite team. The Miami Heat now head to Washington D.C. to face their toughest opponent, the IRS.
• The House Ways and Means Committee ripped IRS officals for targeting government opponents for scrutiny and reprisal. It's an old tradition. Will Rogers once said America has the best government money can buy, then he died in a mysterious plane crash in Alaska.
• President Obama asked Congress Thursday for more money to guard U.S. embassies from attack. It's not necessary. All we have to do is register al-Qaeda as a conservative political action group and the IRS will shut them down for their anti-U.S. government views.
• IRS official Sarah Ingraham, who was in charge of targeting conservatives, was put in charge of doling out ObamaCare. Hollywood noticed. Angelina Jolie is already estranged from her conservative father Jon Voight so it won't bother her to rat on him to get her breast surgery.
• IRS Commissioner Steven Miller stonewalled Congress in testimony Friday. He stated he's an acting commissioner. That's someone from Second City who knows how to act like the executive branch had no knowledge the IRS was targeting conservative groups.
• Italy's former premier Silvio Berlusconi's sex trial Friday had the beautiful teenaged party girl Ruby the Heartbreaker on the witness stand. She testified she used to dress up like a nun at his sex parties in two thousand dollar a night hotel suites and charge rich clients a thousand dollars for sex. If only electric cars did for the economy what Cialis does.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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