![]()
|
|
Jewish World Review April 28, 2021 Rogue Report By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
The Academy Awards drew a record-low viewership Sunday as actors from movies nobody saw took turns bashing the cops. The In Memoriam segment now includes People's Interest in the Oscars. The TV ratings for the Oscars crashed so hard that people thought Tiger Woods was behind the wheel.
• Hollywood tried something new at the Oscars Sunday by holding the ceremony inside the old Union train station in Los Angeles. They had to clear out the homeless to stage the telecast there. Sadly, when the homeless were replaced by actors, the drug use increased and mental illness doubled.
• The Motion Picture Academy certainly complied with a Senate bill passed Thursday banning anti-Asian hate crimes. Three days later the Chinese were handed all the Oscars in an L.A. train station. It took 150 years but someone finally thanked them for building all the railroads in California.
• Portland protestors erupted in more street riots and burning and anarchy this past week in the twelfth month of their state of siege on the city's downtown. I personally can sympathize with their anger. Cocaine is now legal in Oregon but plastic straws aren't, and I'm sure that must be frustrating.
• The White House vowed to adopt greenhouse gas policies that would severely cut down on U.S. consumption of meat. Too often Progressives forget what country they're trying to take over. Joe Biden is going to take away everybody's hamburgers like Barack Obama took away everybody's guns.
• Joe Biden vowed Friday to sign progressive bills to correct an inherently racist U.S. Meanwhile conservatives are taking off their masks, taking up for cops and boycotting the NBA. If there's one thing we should probably do it's decide in advance what to do with the statues from the next Civil War.
• House Democrats vowed to keep pushing to pass a bill establishing a national minimum wage that'd elevate restaurant workers to the middle class. It's untrue when people say minimum-wage-paying jobs are not hard. Too many people have seen me try to roll my own burrito and it's a tragedy. • California reporters heard Caitlyn Jenner say she was proud to be both Republican as well as a trans-gender conservative. Jenner is world-famous in either sex. In 1976, Bruce Jenner defeated the Soviet Union, and that is the kind of track record necessary to turn things around in California today. • Chicago's Mayor Lightfoot is set to ban the police from pursuing suspects on foot to prevent suspects being shot by cops, although almost all Chicago shootings are between gang members. You'd never know that from the media. The oldest rule in journalism is, if it bleeds, it's Trump's fault. • NASA scientists celebrated last week when they were able to get the Mars craft to fly in Mars' atmosphere. Young people who weren't raised during the space race know little about aeronautics. Millennials have no idea you can fly from any airport in the world without announcing it on Facebook. • Hunter Biden wrote in his book about taking the psychedelic drug LSD that alters your visual perception of reality with a color-splashing body rush. He was born too late. Baby Boomers have learned you don't need to do LSD because you can get the same feeling just by standing up really fast. • The London Sun says a boatload of Vikings promoting a British Museum exhibition sailed by the House of Parliament Friday. Famously uncivilized, destructive, rapacious with an insatiable appetite for rough sex and drinking, nevertheless, the lawmakers looked up for a moment in approval. The Post Office didn't deliver mail to West Hollywood Monday, making me curious. I looked up the holiday and it was Confederate Memorial Day. It's a coincidence or it shows government workers in California believe in the greatness of Lincoln except when it gives them a day off at full pay.
JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
=
© 2020, Argus Hamilton |
Columnists
Toons
Lifestyles |