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Jewish World Review April 30,2018 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
• Senator John McCain is reportedly recovering at home in Arizona after intestinal surgery related to diverticulitis. It's hard to tell who's rooting for him to get well. When John McCain steps down from the U.S. Senate, there is a good chance that the seat will flip to a Republican.
• French President Emmanuel Macron turned on Trump in his speech to Congress. He ripped Trump over climate change, over America First, and hating the Iran deal. French fries were invented in America, but we named them after the French, because after you eat them you feel fat and defeated.
• The White House said President Trump will visit Great Britain in mid-July where he will meet with Queen Elizabeth and Prime Minister Theresa May. Everyone should be in a good mood. The visit will occur a week after America's Independence Day, or as the British celebrate it, Thanksgiving.
• The Wall Street Journal reported Tuesday that the cost of college tuition, room and board has gone up five hundred percent in thirty years. For parents, college is the opposite of kidnapping. They demand that you give them one hundred thousand dollars or they will send your kid back home.
• Conde Nast reported that the booming U.S. economy has resulted in a huge increase in spring break travel by college students this year. It's so necessary for them. Spring break is a cherished time when kids get to take a break from binge-drinking in Michigan to go binge-drinking in Florida.
• Kanye West issued a tweet supporting President Trump, threatening a crack in the Democratic coalition. Dems have only themselves to blame. How often do you have to call Trump a gangster and a racist and a womanizer before rap stars start wondering why they're supposed to hate this guy?
• Queen Elizabeth announced Wednesday that Prince Charles has been selected to be the head of the British Commonwealth. The Commonwealth is an association of English-speaking nations that once comprised the British Empire. These countries are better-known today as U.S. missile bases.
• Duchess Kate Middleton and Prince William posed for photographers with their new baby boy at London Hospital after the Royal Couple gave birth to the child who's now fifth in line for the throne. Buckingham Palace reported that mother and baby are doing well. That's an understatement.
• The Supreme Court heard arguments on the constitutionality of President Trump's order that bans visitors to the U.S. from terrorist states. Ironically, a recent poll showed that Muslims are the happiest ethnic group in the U.S. It's because Trump's travel ban prevents their relatives from visiting.
• President Trump's lawyers defended his travel ban on people from dangerous countries in the Supreme Court. Opponents say prejudice against Muslims is widespread. It's not right that Amazon customers start to see You Might Also Like ads for Semtex and alarm clocks when they buy a Koran online.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
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© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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