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Jewish World Review March 19, 2012/ 25 Adar, 5772 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | The San Francisco Drug Users Union set up union headquarters Thursday and began lobbying for legalization of all drugs in California. It's the first drug-users union. They are exactly like the Teamsters except that only the marijuana smokers eat the doughnuts.
President Obama gave a speech defending his energy policy to Maryland college kids Wednesday. He had the sound system reverb turned up for added echo. He thinks if he sounds enough like the voice of the Lord, the Republicans will agree to raise taxes on the rich.
President Obama chose Missouri, North Carolina, Kentucky and Ohio State in his NCAA Final Four on ESPN Thursday. You've got to hand it to him. He knew everything about all sixty-four teams, then he picked four schools from swing states crucial to his re-election.
Mitt Romney jetted to New York Thursday to raise three million dollars at a Waldorf Astoria hotel dinner fundraiser. The crowd was full of Manhattan multi-millionaires. Mitt makes it a habit to mingle with the middle class so he can learn how to appeal to them.
Rick Santorum vowed to rid the Internet of pornography if elected president and get porn off the web, off cable, and off hotel TV menus. He's clearly out of his mind. The only thing more popular in America than porn is voting against politicians who try to get rid of it.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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