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Jewish World Review March 2, 2004 /9 Adar, 5764

Argus Hamilton

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And now for the
important news .... | Haiti broke out in massive street looting Sunday when the government fell to the rebels entering the capital. International help is on the way. The mayors of Baghdad and Los Angeles quickly sent six planeloads of looters to aid in the effort.

CIA Director George Tenet told the Senate Intelligence Committee Tuesday he couldn't catch a September 11th terrorist before the attack even though he was tipped off, because all he was given was his name and phone number. He had the guy's name, he had the guy's phone number, and he never called. At least we know he's not gay.

Barry Bonds vehemently denied charges by an opposing pitcher Friday that he uses steroids. It's a serious charge. If it turns out that Barry Bonds used steroids to bulk up and add muscle mass, he could get four to eight years as governor of California.

John Kerry ripped President Bush for replacing two members of a bio-ethics panel that advises him on cloning. It's an exciting field. One day parents will be able to guarantee they have kids who are smart and athletic and can produce wool.

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