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Jewish World Review Feb. 26, 2018 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
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Politico reports the upcoming Illinois primary could result in the upset of both the Democratic and GOP billionaire nominees by insurgent candidates. It's exciting. Illinois is the only state where the current governor rides around in a town car bearing license plates made by their former governor.
• A University of California research team on human aging announced Wednesday if you drink several drinks of of alcohol daily, it increases your chance of reaching ninety. This was big news politically. Democrats can regain the House if they offer to replace Obama Care with Churchill Care.
• The New York Times published a poll of political scientists saying Donald Trump is the worst U.S. president because he's so divisive. They said Abe Lincoln was the best. Wait a minute, Trump may be divisive but fifty thousand men haven't been killed at Gettysburg over HIS farm worker policy.
• The White House dismissed the New York Times poll rating Trump as the worst U.S. president as typical badgering by the mainstream media. It never ends. President Trump could walk across the Potomac River and the next day the headline in the New York Times would read Trump Can't Swim.
• Washington's Birthday was observed at Mount Vernon. His victory at Yorktown was made possible when a French fleet fleeing a late season hurricane accidentally found and trapped the Redcoats on the Virginia peninsula awaiting re-supply as they were sweeping north to trap Washington against the Hudson. It'd kill Al Gore to learn that the U.S. was caused by global warming.
• Focus on the Family called for a renewal of family time together and family spiritual practice together to help heal our tension-riddled culture. Yet remember, it could always be worse. If you think there is tension in your family, picture the Clintons sitting down to breakfast on Presidents Day.
• South Korea's hosting of the Winter Olympic Games put the spotlight on the educational prowess of Korean school kids. Their culture of hard work in school produces educational achievement that is the envy of the world. Korean students always turn in their homework because they ate the dog.
• Joe Biden got the jump on Hillary, Bernie Sanders and Jerry Brown by admitting he that he may run for president. The four Democrats have a combined age of three hundred years. They can't attend memorial services at Arlington Cemetery without being stalked by guys with shovels.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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