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Jewish World Review Feb. 3, 2015 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
• President Obama was urged by civil rights leaders Friday to try to improve black unemployment numbers while he's still in office. How bad is it? The economy is so bad in South Central Los Angeles that rap moguls who run over rival drug dealers on the streets of Compton have been forced to carpool.
• American Sniper gained Oscar buzz Friday as the movie passed two hundred million at the box office in America. The public appreciates the movie's contrast in its unambiguous attitude toward terrorists. President Obama wages war like he's afraid the enemy is going to call Child Services on him.
• The U.S. Senate passed a bill authorizing the Keystone pipeline on Thursday, setting the stage for an Obama veto. The Congress and the president agree on little. The last two years of the Obama administration could feature more vetos than an emergency meeting of the Five Families of New York.
• Dartmouth College banned liquor on campus Friday and ruled that every student must take part in a four-year program aimed at prevening violence against women. They got it half right. The liquor rule makes sense but when was the last time you heard an NFL player being drafted out of Dartmouth?
• Facebook's Mark Zuckerberg began polling groups to determine what stories go on News Feed daily. He wants to make a newspaper for FB users along with personal posts, photos and videos. More than anybody, Mark Zuckerberg has revolutionized the way we avoid doing work in this country.
• Attorney General nominee Loretta Lynch told her Senate confirmation committee that illegal aliens have the same right to work as U.S. citizens. It's a sign of the times. The Democratic Party used to enjoy the advantage of having eight children in every family, but now they just order in.
• President Obama returned to from a trip to India followed by a previously un-scheduled stop in Saudi Arabia. The president had to stop to meet Saudi Arabia's new king. Obama also met Saudi Arabia's first lady, then he met the second lady, then he met the third lady, then he met the fourth lady.
• Hillary Clinton agreed to testify to the House committee on the Benghazi attack but the House can't get State's records. The president's in the clear. President Obama can prove he knew nothing about a terrorist attack on the consulate, he was too busy not knowing anything about the IRS scandal.
• Colorado hospitals reported an alarming increase in the number of cases of respiratory illnesses diagnosed in Coloradans this year. The treatment is obvious. In order to clear up lung congestion, Colorado doctors are advising all sufferers to switch from recreational marijuana to medical marijuana.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
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© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
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