|
|
|
Jewish World Review Feb 24, 2012/ 1 Adar, 5772 The News in Zingers By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | The Auto Club reported gas prices at the pump soared for the fifteenth straight day Wednesday. It upsets the owners of electric cars. The moment gas prices hit four dollars a gallon, people think they bought the car because they don't have money.
Los Angeles public schools had their sixth sex scandal in four weeks involving teachers and students Wednesday. It's completely out of control. Last week one high school kid was discovered to be having an affair with two of his teachers and he was expelled for cheating.
Whitney Houston's home was put up for sale for two million dollars Monday. The realtor advertised one room as the place where she began her fifteen-year drug spiral. Buyers think they can dump the vacuum cleaner bag and there'll be enough cocaine in there to pay the mortgage.
Iran refused demands to shut down its nuclear weapons program Tuesday inviting tougher sanctions to cripple their economy. War isn't necessary. President Obama could force Iran to adopt his environmental program to protect the Persian Gulf, and that will bring them to their knees in six weeks.
Italian authorities announced Tuesday they seized six trillion dollars in worthless U.S. Treasury bonds from terrorists from the Middle East intending to purchase nuclear components. The bonds are not completely worthless for weapons. If you shred them they can be fired from confetti cannons.
New Jersey's Department of Tourism reported a huge honeymoon business in hotels used in the series Jersey Shore. It was never known as a romantic destination. In New Jersey, popping the question means asking the woman you intend to marry if she's wearing a wire.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Argus Hamilton |
Columnists
Toons
Lifestyles | |||||||||||
