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Jewish World Review Feb. 16, 2005 / 7 Adar I, 5765 And now for the important news .... By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
The Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show got underway in New
York on Monday. The competition for Best in Show is fierce. Last
night Jose Canseco was seen backstage and the next thing you know,
whippets were catching frisbees forty feet in the air.
Barry Bonds was called a steroid user by a longtime mistress
Sunday after he was named as a steroid user before a grand jury.
The drug carries health risks. Last summer forty fans got mercury
poisoning diving into the bay after his home runs.
Sunset Boulevard was the site of a new right-wing billboard
Friday that thanks Hollywood for re-electing President Bush.
Nobody can believe their eyes. It's the political equivalent of
the marquee of the First Baptist Church of Lubbock welcoming the
Teddy Kennedy Crusade.
Hillary Clinton spoke to the Munich Security Conference
Monday. She received rave reviews from the foreign ministers of
both France and Germany. During the flight over she spent the
entire time reading The Kerry Way to Be Elected President.
President Clinton won a Grammy for the audio version of his
book My Life. It is one thousand pages long. He always brings his
book with him when he travels to South Asia because when he throws
it overhand he can bring down a water buffalo.
The National Ballistic Missile Defense System flunked its
second test in two months Monday. The interceptor wouldn't come
out of its silo. They are renaming this missile the Civil Servant
because you can't fire it and you can't make it work.
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© 2005 Argus Hamilton |