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Jewish World Review Jan. 11, 2005 / 1 Shevat, 5765 And now for the important news .... By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Los Angeles was flooded Sunday by heavy storms from the
South Pacific called the Pineapple Express. High tides pounded
Malibu Beach. Hollywood was thrilled when they saw they can shoot
the tsunami movie without going into a bad neighborhood.
Tiger Woods said his wife gives him golf tips over dinner
every night. She's a supermodel. He hasn't won a major since he
met her but you should see the flashbulbs pop when he spins his
hips and walks down the cart path toward the rough.
Michael Moore won the People's Choice Award on Sunday for
Fahrenheit 9/11. His acceptance speech was in character. He
claimed that at the very moment the tsunami hit, President Bush
was in a classroom reading One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish.
Bob Novak reported on CNN's Inside Politics Friday that the
Presidential Inaugural Committee has cut out party favors for
guests at the ball. There are no giveaways. It's one thing to make
fun of Democrats, it's another to make fun of their religion.
John Kerry met Saturday with Syria's president Bashar al-
Assad and expressed hope U.S.-Syrian relations can improve. It's
good that they met. Bashar al-Assad is a licensed doctor of
optometry and John Kerry can't see how he lost the election.
Paul Newman escaped from a burning race car at Daytona
Speedway on Sunday. He spun out while he was testing a prototype
car and the engine caught fire when he re-started it. With high
gas prices you knew Ford would try to bring back the Pinto.
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© 2005 Argus Hamilton |