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Jewish World Review July 23, 2002 / 14 Menachem-Av 5762
Contented cows
http://www.jewishworldreview.com |
I am a roving reporter doing a survey on THE PURPOSE OF LIFE. The majority of
those polled said: "The purpose of life is to be happy". They are being very
honest with their feelings. In psychological terms what they are seeking is
"contentment"-since one of the strongest biologic drives is to avoid
discomfort.
It is clear, however, that human beings often voluntarily accept some forms
of discontent. When the alarm rings in the morning, we would really prefer to
turn it off and cozy under the covers "just five (ten) more minutes ---
please." When we drag ourselves out of bed to go to work we are actually
frustrating a natural desire ---and we do this only because there is a goal
which supersedes the desire for physical contentment.
The goal of earning
one's livelihood and supporting one's family overrides the natural desire to
continue sleeping. This is the prototype for accepting a degree of discomfort
or making a sacrifice for the sake of an ultimate goal. Accepting the
increasing inconvenience and delays of heightened security measures at our
nations' airports for the goal of greater protection is another case in
point.
This concept is of great importance in the prevention of addiction. When the
rather naive campaign was launched, urging youngsters to: "Just say no to
drugs," some adolescents who were interviewed responded: "Why? What else is
there"?
There is no denying that alcohol and other mind altering substances give the
user some type of pleasant sensation. Even if the "high" does not constitute
a state of euphoria, it is at least a respite from unpleasant sensations of
anxiety, tension, depression and awkward self-consciousness. The use of such
chemicals is nothing other than the pursuit of contentment.
But why should young people (and more than just a few baby boomers) risk the
serious social, physical, and psychological consequences of mind-altering
chemicals? Are there no other, safer, and more durable ways of achieving a
feeling of contentment?
Of course there are. The problem is that:
1. These do not produce immediate results; and
2. One must have sufficient self confidence that one's efforts can
ultimately achieve the desired state of contentment.
The problem of immediate gratification is relatively new in the history of
mankind and may explain why the use of mind-altering substances is much more
prevalent now than in previous times.
Years ago people were accustomed to waiting. Travel by stage coach was of
weeks duration, as was mail by pony express. Foods would cook slowly over a
period of hours, and transactions involving long columns of figures had to
laboriously calculated and rechecked. The miracles of technology have
eliminated all waiting. Jet flight, the telephone, the fax and email have
made communication instantaneous. Pre-cooked food and microwave ovens have
eliminated time delay in food preparation, and the magic of computers has
reduced complex mathematical calculations to nano-seconds. We have even
become impatient with the speed of speed and now demand broadband instead of
the snail paced "dial up." Speed is the password of technology, and with the
exception of pregnancy, everything appears hurried, hectic and frenzied.
In an ethos where virtually everything is expected to occur instantaneously,
it is difficult to impress young people (and many baby boomers, too) that
they should wait for years to achieve a state of well being. The quest for
the quick fix that will solve all of our issues and problems is quite in
keeping with the fast paced, throw away, new and improved generation we live
in.
Even if the delay were to be tolerated, this will only be when we see a light
at the end of the tunnel; i.e., when we feel with reasonable certainty that
the desired state of contentment is within reach. This requires a degree of
self confidence and an awareness of and a trust in one's own capabilities that is so lacking in our low self esteem society.
Many people have a distorted self-concept that causes them to be oblivious to
their own personality strengths and assets. The nature and complexity of the
modern super-industrialized society may have contributed to the prevalence of
the low self-concept. Where there is a lack of self esteem, the aspiration
that a state of contentment is achievable is greatly diminished, and with
nothing else to look forward to, young people (and more than a few baby
boomers) who feel this way are easily attracted to mind-altering chemicals.
The only answer is the development of a goal or goals above and beyond that
of contentment, something for which people will be willing to forego physical
comfort
and accept sacrifice, just as one does when one allows the alarm clock to
interrupt the nirvana of sleep.
Pride in one's humanness can provide this ultimate goal, but only if one sees
oneself as more than merely homo sapiens. The sapiens in man is that which
brought about the Concorde, compact discs, DVD and zip loc baggies. Is there
something more?
Animals, too, are driven to seek contentment. One producer of dairy products
advertises that its raw material is "milk from contented cows." The rationale
is that the highest quality milk is produced by the contented cow-the highest
quality of cow. Certainly the pride of man should instill in him a drive for
the kind of excellence that surpasses that of cows. The milk producer is
right. Contentment is indeed bovine excellence, because cows are creatures
without a spirit. Spiritual man must be different.
There are many goals open to man. One person may be drawn to the preservation
of the environment or to the protection of an endangered species. Another may
be motivated to combat poverty or to improve the lot of the homeless. Yet
another may dedicate his efforts to relieve the hunger in famine-stricken
countries, and yet another may seek the heights of religious experience and
devote himself to fulfillment of religious teachings through acts of
kindness. There is no dearth of goals available to man, if he would only turn
off his television and become a proactive player in any field of human
endeavor and betterment. These goals are all beyond the capacity of animals
and make them unique components of the human spirit.
The spiritual person is thus one who is willing to sacrifice his personal
comfort and physical contentment for a goal external to himself. Development
of such spirituality among young people (and one or two baby boomers) may be
the only way they may be deterred from the destructive use of mind altering
chemicals. Without such spirituality, neither prohibition, interdiction of
drugs at the border, legalization of drugs, nor any other method of
enforcement is likely to succeed. Furthermore, absence of chemicals does not
lead to elimination of addiction, because lack of spirituality and the
pursuit of contentment for its own sake will lead to some other type of
indulgent behavior. The development of our spiritual selves remains the best
prescription for reclaiming our humanity.
Previously:
Spiritual animals?
By Dr. Abraham Twerski, M.D.
The Believer's Guide to 'Buying' Happiness
Preventing future attacks
American Spirituality
Trust
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD): A very real condition
Helping our kids deal with trauma
The Creator helps those who help themselves
Knowing what to expect
Psychological fallout in the shadow of terrorism
Self-esteem in the face of world terrorism
Abraham J. Twerski, M.D. is a psychiatrist and ordained rabbi. He is the
founder of the Gateway Rehabilitation Center in Pittsburgh, a leading center
for addiction treatment. An Associate Professor of Psychiatry at the University
of Pittsburgh School of Medicine, he is a prolific author, with some 30 books to
his credit. He has recently launched a new 12 step program for self esteem development www.12steps2selfesteem.com
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