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December 2, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review Feb. 24, 2006 / 26 Shevat, 5766

The Free World was Fun While It Lasted

By Julia Gorin


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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Next month, a United Arab Emirates company named Dubai Ports World is set to take over commercial management of six major U.S. ports. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales and other defenders of the deal assure us that the firm went through a "very extensive" review process.


I've conducted an extensive review process of my own, and found that ARABS will be running our ports. If on September 12th, 2001, I'd gone around telling people that in a few years we'd be having an all-Arab company managing our ports, I'd have been committed. But since President Bush tells me I've got nothing to be worried about, I think I'll try casually stopping by the management offices of these ports, wearing a particularly blingy Star of David pendant around my neck, and see what happens.


The AP reports that the firm "pledged to continue participating in programs to stop smuggling and detect illegal shipments of nuclear materials," but I think Oslo showed us what a Middle Eastern pledge amounts to.


White House counselor Dan Bartlett defended the plan on "The Early Show," saying, "The president wants this deal to go forward because it was followed by the book and he wants Congress to understand that."


It's nice that we have a rule book which we follow, but unfortunately, Arab countries also have a rule book-and it outlines how to deal with infidels wherever you encounter them, and how agreements with infidel nations can and should be used. I know most Americans were hoping the Islamic takeover would happen more gradually, but the president has given it a boost now, saving the movement several years.


Many see "anti-Arabism," "bigotry" and "phobia" in the uproar over the ports deal, but the problem isn't that so much; it's just that we don't want to die. Then again, since leaving the USSR, I've enjoyed over 25 years of freedom. That's more than a lot of people ever get a taste of in their lifetimes, and I don't want to be ungrateful. Therefore, in honor of next month's port sale, and in the spirit of gratitude for what was, following is a list of a few of my favorite things from this life:

  • Dogs (especially mutts)

  • Palm trees

  • Hot fudge sundaes (I said fudge, not chocolate syrup!)

  • Roller coasters

  • Chocolate cake (must be moist)

  • Hotels

  • Manicures (acrylic tips)

  • My normal, all-American teen years

  • Working out at 1 a.m.

  • "South Park"

  • Cosmopolitans (cotton-candy pink, not red)

  • Lipstick (glossy)

  • Heather Robinson

  • Trains (not subways)

  • Vegas

  • Meeting my husband in 7th Grade (and rejecting him for the next 12 years)

  • Skylines

  • 80s rock

  • Buffets (After 9/11, my husband and I started hitting every buffet we could find, but on the east coast these are limited to Sundays, so we moved to Vegas, where you can eat buffets all day, every day. So far, I've put on 40 pounds. Because I figure that when Islam completes its takeover of the West, if it's generous enough to put any Jews in concentration camps before liquidating, I would have enough fat to live on for six to eight months before starving.)

  • Dog the Bounty Hunter

  • Dancing (the "Fame" and "Flashdance" kind)

  • My first job (Darrell's Almost Famous Ice Creamery and Café in Baltimore)

  • SUVs

  • Costume jewelry (If you've never been to the wholesale jewelry district in New York, schedule a final trip to the city before it's wiped out. The baubles reside on both Broadway and Sixth Avenue, between 27th and 38th Streets. You won't believe the prices of these dazzling creations; they're made in China (that enemy is much more fun, giving us some bling for our buck at least, and burying us in much more sparkly ways). (What is it about an oppressive Communist regime that churns out the most fabulous costume jewelry? The Soviet Union never came up with stuff like this. Tsar Nicholas would be jealous.))

  • Good chain restaurants like the Cheesecake Factory

  • The Internet

  • We The Living

  • Sleeping (It's not true that "you can sleep when you're dead." You become pure energy, without a body that requires recuperation)

  • Starbucks (not the coffee; the atmosphere)

  • Movies (action and horror, not films)

  • George W. Bush (before he broke my heart and issued my death warrant--and I think it's pretty thankless, after the way I've defended him for six years, that he would choose the Arabs over this Jew)

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

JWR contributor Julia Gorin is a widely published op-ed writer and comedian who blogs at www.JuliaGorin.com. Comment on by clicking here.

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© 2005, Julia Gorin.

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