Home
In this issue

July 2, 2009

Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski: The hallmark of a person

Abe Novick: Up, up, and aliya

July 1, 2009

Rabbi Avi Shafran: The Road Taken

The Kosher Gourmet by Marialisa Calta: Get into the holiday spirit with these Star-Spangled desserts

June 30, 2009

Rabbi Binyomin Ginsberg: What makes a great parent?

Caroline B. Glick: Ideologue-in-Chief

June 29, 2009

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Beware of 'Caveat Emptor'

Steven Emerson: ACLU pushing for more money for Hamas

June 26, 2009

Rabbi Yoni Posnick: Learn the secret to a healthy marriage from a scriptural villain

Caroline B. Glick: Barack Obama vs. International Law

June 25, 2009

Rabbi Shimon Apisdorf: The Absurd Power of Truth

Jordan "Gorf" Gorfinkle's strip: Everything's Relative

June 24, 2009

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Advancement of technology is a wake-up call for humanity

The Kosher Gourmet by Andrea Weigl: Summer on a stick: Making frozen treats can be easy, creative and fun

June 23, 2009

Martin M. Bodek: 'On Surnames': And so, We Begin

Caroline B. Glick: The Obama Effect

June 22, 2009

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Working for a corrupt firm

N. Richard Greenfield : Where are American Jews?

June 19, 2009

Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski: Emotion v. intellect

Caroline B. Glick: Israel's rare opportunity

June 18, 2009

Jonathan Rosenblum: Sometimes it is more essential to define the nature of evil than good

Jordan "Gorf" Gorfinkle's strip: Everything's Relative

June 17, 2009

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: The Language of Confusion

The Kosher Gourmet by Linda Gassenheimer: Nothing pleases Dad more than a thick, juicy onion-smothered steak. Add home-Baked Potato Chips and …

June 16, 2009

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Career v. Careersism

Caroline B. Glick: Obama's losing streak and Israel

Richard Z. Chesnoff: ‘Palestinians’: Never Missing an Opportunity …

June 15, 2009

Israeli Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu: How Judea and Samaria can become 'Palestine'

Daniel Pipes: Where Netanyahu's speech failed

June 12, 2009

Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski: Some big thoughts about not acting so big

Caroline B. Glick: Obama's High Commissioner

June 11, 2009

Victor Davis Hanson: Our historically challenged President

Mitch Albom: Beware the True Believers

Lewis Grossberger: What we learn from the new Hitler photos

June 10, 2009

Mort Zuckerman: What Obama and his advisors won't -- or refuse to -- grasp about Israel and the Muslim world

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Lotsa pasta: Tips, techniques and (amazing) taste

June 9, 2009

Anne Bayefsky: Obama's stunning offense to Israel and the Jewish people

Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: America's first Muslim president?

June 8, 2009

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Merchant must take responsibility for careless shopper?

Mark Steyn: A superpower that feeds on mediocrity cannot survive for long on leftovers from the past

Richard Z. Chesnoff: How do you say 'kumbaya' in Arabic?

June 5, 2009

Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski: In quest of spirituality

Caroline B. Glick: Obama's Arabian dreams

Charles Krauthammer: The Settlements Myth

June 4, 2009

Paul Greenberg: The War Comes to Little Rock

The Kosher Gourmet by Judy Hevrdejs: Splash it on! Tap your inner jazz musician and improvise when stirring up a vinaigrette

June 3, 2009

The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Q. Should terrible teacher be exposed?

Jonathan Rosenblum: The Israel Lobby: Missing in Action

June 2, 2009

Dennis Prager: The Speech President Obama Won't Dare Give in Egypt

Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: Pressure on Israel raises war risk

Oct. 29, 2003
Mortimer B. Zuckerman: Graffiti On History's Walls (MUST-READ!)

Jewish World Review March 5, 2007 / 15 Adar, 5767

Teenager in our Midst

By Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir


Printer Friendly Version

Email this article

Should we report our neighbor who is breaking our age-restricted community by-laws?


http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Q: I'm on the administrative committee of an age-restricted (over-55) community. One neighbor is living with his teenage grandson, in violation of our community by-laws. Can I report his violation to the committee, which will then weigh sanctions?


A: Let's study first the background of this question.


While originally there was little regulation of resident restrictions in the US, the growing civil-rights consciousness of the 1960's gave rise to the Fair Housing Act which prohibited arbitrary discrimination in housing. Among the protected categories are race and family status, for example prohibiting single-parent families or those with young children.


However, Congress decided that allowing older people to establish a quiet community served an important public interest, and created an exception to the Act. The Housing for Older Persons Act makes it legal to establish a community designed for and restricted to households where at least one member is over 55. (My understanding is that even these communities may not discriminate based on family status for those people who meet the criteria or are exempt from them. They cannot preferentially exclude one 55-year- old because he is a single parent of teenaged children.)


Since grandchildren are not considered family members for the purpose of the statute, communities may and do forbid their residence. (Of course they are encouraged to visit.)


What about reporting the violation? Jewish law strictly regulates any kind of damaging speech, including turning someone in for a violation. The great 20th century authority Rabbi Yisrael Meir HaCohen wrote an entire book on this topic, entitled Chafetz Chaim — "He who wants life". The title refers to the Biblical verse, "Who is the man who wants life, and loves days to see good? He who guards his tongue from evil, and his lips from speaking deceit" (Psalms 34:13-14). The Chafetz Chaim explains that such reporting is only permissible if five conditions are met — the ABC's of kosher speech:


The report must be Accurate; it must be the only way to bring about a constructive Benefit; fact checking must attain an appropriate level of Certainty; there must be a constructive intent and Desire, and not a vindictive motive; and the report must be Equitable, and not expose the subject to any excessive sanctions. (1)


If you have verified that the resident does indeed have a grandson living with him, and you have tried alternatives to reporting such as a friendly discussion with the resident himself, and if your objective is only to maintain the by-laws for the benefit of the residents, then the only criterion left is Equity.


The equity criterion has two aspects here. The first is that the rule itself is equitable; the second is that it is applied in a fair and equitable fashion. Let's discuss these separately.


Jewish law attaches great importance to community by-laws. An entire chapter of the Talmud (the first chapter of tractate Bava Basra) is devoted to elucidating the laws and customs related to neighbors in a common courtyard or city. These include principles for what kinds of tenants may fairly be excluded from the residence. While the relevant questions in ancient Babylonia were sometimes different than those in 21st century North America, the basic principles are the same: Residents are within their rights to make regulations protecting living conditions (for example, zoning restrictions on businesses which make noise or which bring excessive traffic) as long as they don't create unreasonable hardships. For example, a family can be prevented from permanently dividing a residence and bringing in an additional family, because this is a significant hardship for the residents. But they cannot be prevented from inviting guests, since the hardship for others is limited whereas prohibiting guests is an unreasonable hardship for the current tenant. (2)


The other aspect of equity is fair procedure. If the result of your report would be that the committee would summarily evict the youngster from his home, that would certainly be inequitable. Regulations are important, but there is usually another side to the story. However, you tell me that suspected violators are given an open hearing to present their version of events and regulations, and that they also have the right to appeal rulings of local committees before an impartial state board.


If you believe that the regulation prohibiting grandchildren serves a constructive purpose; if you have tried alternatives to reporting including explaining the regulations to the tenant; and if there is an orderly and equitable procedure for this grandfather to obtain a fair hearing, then you may report the situation to the committee. Given the fact that you are a committee member and have a special obligation to uphold its decisions, it is even appropriate for you to do so.


At the same time, I urge you to help the grandfather and the boy by informing them of all rights and claims they may have. For example, many such communities have a limited number (generally 20%) of exemptions; the housing regulations permitting eviction may be contradicted by laws protecting minors restricting them, and so on. The objective should be a fair hearing which truly presents the strongest possible case for each side.


SOURCES: (1) Chafetz Chaim vol. II chapter 9. (2) Maimonides, Neighbors 5:8-9.

ARCHIVES

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes inspiring articles. Sign up for our daily update. It's free. Just click here.


JWR contributor Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir, formerly of the Council of Economic Advisers in the Reagan administration, is Research Director of the Business Ethics Center of Jerusalem, Jerusalem College of Technology. To comment or pose a question, please click here.

THE JEWISH ETHICIST, NOW IN BOOK FORM

You've enjoyed his columns on JWR for years. Now the Jewish Ethicist has culled his most intriguing — and controversial — offerings in book form.
HARDCOVER
PAPERBACK
Sales help fund JWR.









© 2007, The Jewish Ethicist is produced by the JCT Center for Business Ethics