Home
In this issue
February 10, 2012
Rabbi Nathan Lopes Cardozo: The biblical case against small-mindedness involved diminishing His precious prophet
Caroline B. Glick: The Peace Process is over. Finally
Lisa M. Krieger: Man with defibrillator demands access to his own heart's information
David G. Savage: Why activists may not be in a hurry to have High Court rule on alternative marriage
Rachel Koning Beals: Gen X Women Continue to Shrink Gender Investing Gap
The Kosher Gourmet by Faith Durand: Who Says You Can't Make Restaurant Favorites at Home?: MANGO AND STICKY RICE
February 9, 2012
Jeff Strickler: An argument a day keeps the divorce away, they say
Clifford D. May: CAIR's Crusade against The Third Jihad
Melissa Healy: Study finds jolt to the brain boosts memory
Laura McMullen: 10 Least Expensive Public Schools for Out-of-State Students
Kimberly Palmer: How to actually enjoy -- relaxing, financially -- your vacation
Emily Brandon: 10 Necessities for a Great Retirement Spot
The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Winter Squash and Red Swiss Chard Risotto is Colorful Cozy Cold Weather Fare (includes detailed dos and don'ts)
February 8, 2012
Rivy Poupko Kletenik: Tree hostility: The auspicious history of the evolution of Tu B'Shevat
Steven Emerson: Planting Trees is Racist?!
Warren Richey: Why momentous Prop. 8 ruling might not satisfy gay-rights groups
Anne Applebaum: Russia's Potemkin democracy
Menachem Wecker: Though Controversial, LL.M.'s Can Lead to Specialized Legal Jobs
Emily Brandon: 10 Necessities for a Great Retirement Spot
The Kosher Gourmet byDana Velden: Going to the bother of making soup? You know it better be good. This CREAM OF TOMATO SOUP certainly is! And it's a cinch to make, too (Includes techinques and serving secrets)
February 7, 2012
Kathleen Hennessey and Christi Parsons: Obama not worried that birth-control move will hurt his re-election chances with Catholics, other faithful
Caroline B. Glick: Obama's rhetorical storm
Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: Caught off-guard? President's Super Bowl interview with Matt Lauer gives those who need a reason not to vote for him, a darn good one
Suzanne Bohan: Leaping lizards! Tiny reptiles advancing robot design
David Francis: How to Avoid an IRS Audit
The Kosher Gourmet by Emma Christensen: These homemade energy bars (3 recipes) are far better workout fuel than commercial ones, packing power and taste
February 6, 2012
Scott Peterson: Iran's top ayatollah: We're trumping the West
Jonathan Tobin: Iran Threatens Israel With Destruction, But the New York Times Doesn't Hear It
Jeffrey Fleishman: In newly democratic Egypt, tens of democracy activists jailed, to stand trial; their groups are 'threatening the stability of the homeland'
Julie Deardorff : Researchers say antioxidants may not be that effective and could do more harm than good
Philip Moeller: Where Smart Investors Put Their Money
Mark Clayton: How did Anonymous hackers eavesdrop on FBI and Scotland Yard?
The Kosher Gourmet by Joseph Erdos: Vegetable Frittata --- leftovers never tasted so scrumptious
February 3, 2012
Rabbi Dr. Warren Goldstein: Living with ideals --- in reality
Caroline B. Glick: Fool me twice
Jonathan Tobin : Adelsonphobia Strikes in Nevada Caucus
Edmund Sanders : Israeli official says Iran is creating missile that could reach East Coast of US
Kimberly Palmer : 8 Ways to Get Ready for Retirement Now
Victoria Kim: Immigrant-smuggling ring used black drivers to avoid racial profiling
The Kosher Gourmet by Faith Durand: A quick cookie recipe: Hazelnut and Olive Oil Shortbread: Sweet, Nutty, and Savory
February 2, 2012
Rabbi Yaakov Rosenblatt : Welcome Home, Governor Perry
Jim Carney: Wrong number call may have saved her life
Reza Kahlili : Ex-CIA spy in Iran's Revolutionary Guard: What Obama doesn't grasp about striking deals with Tehran
Kelsey Sheehy : 5 Tips for Choosing an M.B.A. Concentration
Rachel Koning Beals : Investors Increasingly Tap Social Media for Stock Tips
Tina Susman: For woodchuck rescuer, every day is Groundhog Day
The Kosher Gourmet by Leela Cyd Ross : Savory vegetable pie is a taste of European bistro with minimal effort and maximal flavor
February 1, 2012
Nara Schoenberg: What to do when you've been dissed
Michelle Malkin: First, They Came for the Catholics
Brian Bennett: US officials see increasing threat of domestic attack from Iran
Lisa M. Krieger: Possible breakthrough in preventing Alzheimer's
Emily Brandon: How to Take Advantage of New 401(k) Fee Disclosures
Susan Johnston: 5 Apps for Organizing Your Expenses at Tax Time
The Kosher Gourmet by Mario Batali: The famed chef's Broccoli and White Bean Soup can easily be a lunch in itself, or a nice antipasto --- and is hard to mess up
January 31, 2012
Paul Greenberg: Separation of Church and State works two ways
Caroline B. Glick: Hamas and the Washington establishment
Frank J. Gaffney Jr.: Uncle Sam is joining in efforts to crack down on Islamists' critics
Danielle Kurtzleben: The 10 Worst Cities for Finding a Job
Laura McMullen: 3 Tips to Overcome a Bad Grade in College
The Kosher Gourmet by Faith Durand: Orzo dish mixes plump, chewy grains with caramelized onions, garlic, mushrooms and sweet potato
January 30, 2012
Rabbi Avi Shafran: Blind faith and physics
Paul Richter and Ramin Mostaghim: Misreading Teheran's limits -- deadly and economically devastating as they may be -- is a risk administration, Europe seem willing to take
Suzanne Bohan: Warning: Nap-deprived tots missing more than sleep, study finds
Meg Handley: Banks Revamping Rewards Programs to Woo Customers
Menachem Wecker: 3 Do's and Don'ts for Healthy Studying in College
The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Butternut Squash Gratin with Tomato Fondue is a combination of the sweet and creamy
January 27, 2012
Rabbi Berel Wein: What Pharaoh can teach us sophisticates about being stubborn
Caroline B. Glick: Obama: Of course I intend to prevent a nuclear holocaust . . . in a few months
Yochonon Donn: In liberal New York City, fervently-Orthodox Jews may soon be getting a district to call their own
Jeannine Stein: An inflated ego and thinking you're 'all that' doesn't just make others sick of you, it can make you ill
Katy Hopkins: New budget rules may affect how much money you get for college
The Kosher Gourmet by Emma Christensen: Barigoule is a light and tangy dish of artichoke hearts stewed in white wine
January 26, 2012
Jonathan Tobin: Newt the closet anti-Semite?
Ed Koch: To the New York Times, calling for the murder of Jews by those capable of having their incitement taken seriously isn't news
Martin Peretz: One Year Later: The Failure of the Arab Spring
Rachel Koning Beals: Need to Know info before investing in Muni Bonds this year
Jeannine Stein: Mental illness struck one in five U.S. adults in 2010: Report
The Kosher Gourmet by Leela Cyd Ross: Curried Coconut Carrot Soup. Need we say more?
January 25, 2012
Andrew Silow-Carroll: Speak politics the Jewish way!
Richard Simon: House passes two bills endorsing the use of religious symbols at military memorials
Fred Weir: Putin: Multiethnic Russia cannot survive as a US-style 'melting pot'; must find its own way
Susan Johnston: 5 Sneaky Coupon Strategies Consumers Should Watch Out For
Menachem Wecker: Adding an extra 'm' -- marriage -- to that M.B.A.
Melissa Healy: Harnessing shrooms' magic
The Kosher Gourmet by Hilary Meyer: 3 Secrets Leave All of the Comfort in this 'Comfort Food', but few of the Calories
January 24, 2012
Carol Clark: The price of your soul: How your brain decides whether to 'sell out'
Caroline B. Glick: America lost most in 'Arab Spring'. Sadly, many voters still don't grasp the extent
Warren Richey: Drug criminal scores win in GPS ruling from conservative-leaning high court
Jada A. Graves: 6 Careers to Watch in 2012
Jason Koebler: Who Should Have Access to Student Records?
Erika Bolstad: Black conservatives gather to talk about gaining strength
The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: This luscious fruit bread marries toasted pecans with juicy pears. Perfect with a pot of tea
January 23, 2012
Melissa Dribben: Jewish voters to play a key role in Florida's Republican primary
Stephanie Hanes: Toddlers to tweens: Relearning how to play
Jack Kelly : Still ignoring history
Rachel Koning Beals: Awkward Questions You Must Ask Your Financial Adviser
Jordan Rau: In quest to grow, Catholic hospital system will announce this morning its break from church
Ali Safi: U.S. envoy gives Taliban terms for peace talks
The Kosher Gourmet by Emma Christensen: Spanakopita is a golden pie that manages to be healthy yet still taste indulgent
January 19, 2012
Clifford D. May: How terrorists lose their stigma
Suzanne Bohan: Vanquishing social anxieties without drugs
Lisa Fernandez and Sean Webby: In alternative lifestyle, domestic violence means men as victims and women being abusers
Danielle Kurtzleben: The 10 Best Cities for Finding a Job
The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Three bean soup with gremolata
January 18, 2012
Edward I. Koch: Why the Crocodile Tears, Hillary?
David G. Savage: Supreme Court to Principals: You have been warned
George Friedman of Stratfor: Iran, the U.S. and the Strait of Hormuz Crisis
Jason Koebler: 'Holy Grail' of Flu Vaccines by Next Year
Alex M. Parker: The Off-the-Radar Congressional Targets of 2012
The Kosher Gourmet by Susan Russo: Got soft apples? Make Apple-Maple Walnut Breakfast Quinoa
January 17, 2012
Frank J. Gaffney Jr.: No-kidding red lines: U.S. response to an Iranian nuke may be bluster, but Israel's won't be
David G. Savage: They sued their principals after slandering them online --- now the cases are headed to the Supreme Court
Sharon Palmer, R.D.: Believe it or not, your cuppa joe offers potential health perks
David Francis: Where to Invest in 2012: With stocks expected to rebound, opportunity abounds for investors
The Kosher Gourmet by Emma Christensen: Eleventh-Hour Freezer Pasta, Made Interesting: Ravioli with romesco sauce; Tortellini salad with apples and walnuts
January 13, 2012
Chief Rabbi Dr. Warren Goldstein: Expansion Of Spirit (PROFOUND yet UPLIFTING)
Ben Lynfield: Israeli lawmakers move to annex Jewish Judea, one museum at a time
Rachel Koning Beals:Top Complaints About Daily Deal Sites --- how to avoid missteps
Alexia Elejalde-Ruiz: Thriving through touch: Gentle massage helps older people with low mobility improve in mind and body
The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Braised Oxtail Stew with Olives
January 12, 2012
Warren Richey: Landmark Supreme Court ruling a 'resounding win' for religious groups
Warren Richey: Supreme Court says no to new rule on eyewitness testimony
Ken Dilanian and David S. Cloud: In secret study, CIA and 15 other U.S. intelligence agencies warn Obama against leaving Afghanistan too soon
John Fauber : Statins found to raise diabetes risk in postmenopausal women
Katy Hopkins : Consider This Before You Pay for an Online Degree
Menachem Wecker : 4 Technology Must Haves for Online Students
The Kosher Gourmet by Joseph Erdos: This mushroom and barley soup has an intense -- almost nutty -- flavor that mixes robust with Middle East. It has creaminess without cream
January 11, 2012
Shari Roan: Millions of atrial fibrillation sufferers at risk for devastating, but preventable, stroke
Tom Hussain: Pakistan -- recipient of more than $21 billion in civilian and military aid -- speeds pursuit of Iranian pipeline, defying US
David G. Savage: High court signals it won't be loosening TV's 'indecency' rules
Stephen Ceasar: Oklahoma's Islamic law amendment can't go into effect, court rules
Rachel Koning Beals: Should You Invest in Bond Funds or Individual Issues?
The Kosher Gourmet by Faith Durand : Colorful Lentil Salad with Walnuts and Herbs
January 10, 2012
Reza Kahlili: From an ex-CIA spy: US must exploit new split in Iran's Revolutionary Guard
Karen Kaplan: Study: Nicotine replacement products ineffective when used in real-life situations
Paul Bedard: Study: Is Fox Too Balanced?
Rachel Koning Beals: Is it Time to Move into Homebuilder Stocks?
The Kosher Gourmet by Carolyn Malcoun: Brothy Chinese Noodles

Half the Sodium (and More Than Twice the Fiber!)

January 9, 2012
Caroline B. Glick: The land-for-peace hoax (MUST-READ/FORWARD/SHARE)
Michael Doyle: Put through legal hell over dream home, couple fought back hard --- all the way to Supreme Court
Bonnie Miller Rubin: The new college-admission essay: Short and tweet(ish)
Rachel Koning Beals: Why Mid-Caps Stand Out in This Slow-Growth Stretch
The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington: Cumin seed roasted cauliflower with salted yogurt, mint and pomegranate seeds
January 6, 2012
Jonathan Rosenblum: Greatness --- and those who sully it
Clifford D. May: The Historian, the Diplomat, and the Spy
Paul Bedard: Study: Obama Is Late Night's Biggest Joke
Rachel Koning Beals: An Investing Guide to Closed-End Funds
The Kosher Gourmet by Faith Durand: Slow Cooker Peppered Beef Shank in Red Wine

Jewish World Review Nov. 24, 2006 / 3 Kislev, 5767

How to be in Love

By Rabbi David Aaron


Printer Friendly Version
Email this article


Finding the balance between confident assertion and humble surrender


Isaac and Rebecca had two sons: Esau and Jacob. Although they were twins, they were far from identical. Even during Rebecca's pregnancy their character difference was visible. According to Jewish tradition, when the pregnant Rebecca stood near houses of study and prayer, Jacob struggled to come out, but when she passed temples of idolatry, Esau eagerly struggled to come out. (1)


Upon birth, Esau came out reddish, as hairy as a fur coat. This is usually taken as a sign that he would be a shedder of blood. (2) They called him Esau, the Hebrew term for "made," according to Rashi (3) "because he was made and developed with hair as one who is much older." His twin brother then emerged and his hand was grasping Esau's heal. Isaac called the second twin Jacob. If Esau was born physically complete, Jacob was born incomplete, as it says, "Jacob was born circumcised." (4) The boys grew up, and when they reached the age of thirteen, Jacob went his way to the houses of learning and Esau went his way to the house of idolatry. (5)


Esau was a man who knew how to hunt, a man of the field. He ensnared people with their words, trapping them just as he would trap the animals he hunted. This is what the Midrash (6) has to say about him:


R. Abbahu said: he was a trapper and a man of the field, trapping [i.e. deceiving] at home… trapping in the field. He deceived at home asking his father, "How do you tithe salt?" (he wanted to show that he was concerned with doing the will of G-d, although he knew full well that salt was not a subject to the laws of tithes…)


He was also said to make himself "free like a field," meaning that he acted in a promiscuous way. (7) Therefore, Esau was a manipulator, liar and cheat — not quite a good boy. He fulfilled his selfish passions without restraint.


Jacob, on the other hand, was a man who sat in tents, meaning that he was contented to surround himself with the study of G-d's word. He was a scholar, inclined to serving G-d, honest, straight and born already marked with the sign of the covenant with G-d. The Torah describes him being a tam. Rashi explains that a tam is someone who is "not shrewd at deceiving."

ISAAC SEES THE GOOD IN ESAU
Isaac grew old and his eyesight was fading. He called his elder son Esau, and said, "I am old and have no idea when I will die. Now take up your equipment, your quiver and bow and go out to the field and hunt me game. Make it into a tasty dish, the way I like it and bring it to me to eat. My soul will then bless you before I die." (8) The Midrash (9) comments:


Sharpen your weapons so that you do not feed me "nevelos" and "terefos" (an animal slaughtered with a dull knife is, according to Jewish law, unfit to be eaten). Again take your own weapons, so that you do not supply me with proceeds of robbery or violence.


If Isaac suspected Esau of this kind of misconduct and mistrusted his reliability, then why did he want to bless him?


Isaac was clearly not completely blind to Esau's selfish inclinations; however, he believed that Esau was capable of applying his incredible self-confidence and strength towards the service of G-d. Isaac hoped that Esau would transform his selfishness into maintaining a healthy sense of "self" in service to G-d rather than losing him self to G-d. Esau had great potential to achieve the ultimate — to be in love. He thereby indicated to him to take his skills and apply them to doing mitzvos (religious duties), in this case the mitzvah of honoring his father.


The great master of Kabbalah, (10) Rabbi Isaac Luria, who is referred to as the Ari zt'l explains:


"He was a hunter with his mouth" (Genesis 25:28): Esau's holy sparks came from the wisdom and understanding and knowledge in his mouth and from this holiness emerged converts who were great leaders of Israel; Shemayiah, Avtalion, Rebbe Meir and Rebbe Akiva.


The Ari zt"l (11) further comments:


"It is because of this, Isaac loved him hoping that maybe he would become rectified through this."


Isaac saw that Esau had tremendous potential, seeing in him the sparks of Rebbe Meir and Rebbe Akivah — the masters of the Talmud.


The Talmud (12) teaches that:


G-d did not establish His covenant with Israel except for the sake of Oral Tradition, which refers to the Mishnah, Talmud and the Midrash.


It is through the involvement in Talmudic debate that scholars are empowered and rise to a status of godliness. (13)


These and those (opinions of the disputing sages) are the living words of Elohim [gods].


When people reach this level of divine significance and relationship to G-d they then fulfill the ultimate meaning of the covenant — a loving partnership.


The Torah scholar asserts himself and shares in making divine decisions through the dialectic of the Oral Tradition. He is entrusted with the responsibility for the interpretation and administration of G-d's revealed word as embodied in the five books of Moses. New situations will arise in each generation and require critical legal decisions drawn from the laws and principles recorded by the prophet Moses and applied correctly. This takes great confidence and courage. However, this also takes great commitment, devotion and service to G-d. A Torah scholar must have a balanced sense of assertive powers and yet also humility and surrender.



ENJOYING THIS ARTICLE?

You can buy the book at a discount by clicking HERE. (Sales help fund JWR.).


There are several cases in Jewish history where the sages had to have the courage and initiative to break a Torah law for the sake of G-d, as it is written in Psalms: (14)

It is a time to act for G-d they have dissolved Your law.


Rashi (15) explains: "When the time comes to do something for the Holy One, blessed be He, it is permitted to dissolve the Torah."


Rashi, therefore, reads and interprets the verse like this: "Dissolve the law of G-d when it is a time to act for Him."


The very fact that the Oral Tradition has been put into writing is itself a violation of the Jewish law that states that the Oral Tradition must remain oral and not written down.


We find that Rabbi Yochanan and Resh Lakish were studying part of the Oral Tradition from a written text. Their behavior is justified on the basis that one can violate the law for the sake of G-d. They said: "Since it is impossible (i.e. to remember it all), it is a time to act for the sake of G-d."


Imagine what courage it takes for a Torah sage, entrusted with the preservation of G-d's Torah, to break one of its laws for the sake of G-d. Also imagine the great honesty, purity, reverence of G-d and service to G-d that is required of the sage to ensure that this violation of G-d's law is truly and only for G-d's sake without an iota of selfish motives even hidden in the recesses of his subconscious. Therefore, a Torah leader must actualize all his creative powers, courageously take initiative and assert himself while in humble service to G-d. He must be assertive in surrender.


Isaac hoped to balance Esau's confidence and power with humbleness and surrender to G-d which would then make him a great world leader and model of true love and relationship with G-d. All he needed was a balance of Jacob's character.

FINDING THE WHOLE IN ONE
Rebecca, however, thought that Esau was far off from making such adjustments. She saw that it was more realistic to nurture in Jacob some of the qualities of Esau. What Jacob needed was more assertion.


She said, "Now my son [Jacob] listen to me and heed my instructions. Go to the sheep and take two choice young kid-goats. I will prepare them the way your father likes. You must then bring it to your father, so that he will eat and bless you before he dies."


"But my brother Esau is hairy," replied Jacob, "I am smooth skinned."


The Midrash (16) makes a strange comment about this dialogue: when Jacob describes Esau as hairy, he uses the Hebrew term "ish sa'ir," which has the connotation of "demonic," as in the verse from Isaiah, (17) "And satyrs (se'irim) shall dance there." When he describes himself as smooth, he uses the Hebrew word chalak, having the same sense as in the verse from Deuteronomy, (18) "For the chelek (portion) of G-d is His people" which suggests that he was completely at one with G-d, so to speak, a part of G-d.


The Midrash compares Esau and Jacob to two men, one possessing a thick head of hair and the other bald, who stood near a threshing floor. When the chaff flew into the locks of the former, it became entangled in his hair. But when it flew on the head of the bald man he passed his hand over his head and easily removed it. In other words, hairy Esau's wild demonic desires made him susceptible to getting messed up in the chaff of life; he was not able to easily cleanse himself of his wrongdoings. However, Jacob was a simple and straight fellow and was therefore less prone to getting caught up with his problems and any mistakes he might make he could easily fix.


This Midrash seems to indicate that Jacob was reluctant to do what Rebecca suggested not only because he feared getting caught by Isaac, but because he saw the act as lowering himself to Esau's level. He did not want to incorporate qualities in himself that would make him vulnerable to sin, or endanger his state of purity and surrender by adopting such an orientation that would generate an even greater struggle with the evil inclination. His point was: Why complicate life? Let's keep it simple.


When Jacob posed as Esau and deceived his father he actually accepted the struggles with the evil inclination implicit in the Esau-like orientation. He realized that for the sake of G-d and a true relationship of love he had to take this risk. Only a person capable of sinning and overcome the urge can really serve G-d. Only a person who is able to violate a loving relationship can really fulfill it. Only at the risk of sin and the struggle against it can humanity develop the type of selfhood necessary for establishing the covenant and reaching the ultimate experience of being in love. It is the struggle with the evil inclination that empowers us to "be" in love — maintain our distinct sense of self without losing ourselves in our loving service to G-d.


(1) Genesis Rabbah 63:6
(2) Rashi Genesis 25:25 and Genesis Rabbah 63:8
(3) Rashi Genesis 25:26
(4) Avos d'Rabbi Nasson 2
(5) Genesis Rabbah 63:10
(6) Genesis Rabbah 63:10
(7) Genesis Rabbah 63:10
(9) Genesis 27:1-4
(10) Genesis Rabbah 65:13
(11) Likutei Torah, Ovadiah
(12) Perei Eitz Chaim- Shaar 208:3
(13)Talmud, Gittin 60b
(14) Talmud, Eruvin 30b
(15) Psalms 119:126
(16) Talmud Yoma 49a
(17) Genesis Rabbah 65:15
(18) Isaiah 13:21
(19) Deuteronomy 32:9


               — For more on this topic see, please see: Endless Light: the ancient path of Kabbalah to Love, Spiritual Growth and Personal Power


Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes uplifting articles. Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

To comment on this article, please click here.


JWR contributor Rabbi David Aaron is the founder and dean of Isralight, an international organization with programming in Israel, New York South Florida, Philadelphia, Los Angeles and Toronto. He has taught and inspired thousands of Jews who are seeking meaning in their lives and a positive connection to their Jewish roots.

He is the author of the newly released, Inviting G-d In, The Secret Life of G-d, and Endless Light: The Ancient Path of Kabbalah to Love, Spiritual Growth and Personal Power , Seeing G-d and Love is my religion. (Click on links to purchase books. Sales help fund JWR.) He lives in the old City of Jerusalem with his wife and their seven children.



© 2006, Rabbi David Aaron