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Jewish World Review
Nov. 30, 2005
/ 28 Mar-Cheshvan, 5766
Bush vs Clinton: Who Made the Grade?
By
Dave Weinbaum
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
How do fishermen know when it's time to go fishing? They take a poll.
In the absence of major catastrophe, news will be light. How many times can you watch the majestic, glistening tree signifying the arrival of Christmas at Rockefeller Center? How many times can you see "It's a Wonderful Life" until so many brain cells die not even the Red Cross will accept your thinking organ as a donation?
There's one thing that never grows old…That's taking presidential polls.
It's well into fall and Report Cards are due. It's time to grade President Bush on his job. Just to make it interesting, let's compare him to President Clinton at the same point in his second term. Maybe Babs and Daddy Bush will show up with Georgie for his Parent-Voter Conference.
(I weaseled out of flunking the third grade. I pled "elementary insanity"! )
GRADES
COMMUNICATIONS:
Bush C
He got his message through in the debates, but has gone AWOL at crucial times when he needed to pump the war and his econonomic strategies. His style may not be polished, but he comes off as a real person and NOT a phony. Can you say Kerry and Gore? He brought out a whole "barrel of whoopass" in both face to face debates.
Clinton B
Gets A's for style but a C for content. He won reelection with charisma, and a sense of victimization that many Americans identified with, but failed to provide content in many areas especially in the advancement of National Security.
POLLS:
Bush D
Appears at times not to care about polls. That's a mistake. You're in politics, for God's sake. In order for your policies to work, you need support. That takes communication, recognition and effort. It's part of the job!
Clinton B
A man who relied on polls over any other thing, security, morals, truth, and duty. He lived and died by the polls, and it worked in the short term.
RELIANCE ON POLLS:
Bush B
Even though Dubya didn't work the polls well, to his credit he didn't let the polls dictate his decisions, especially on National Security.
Clinton F
Became a total slave to the polls, and this was before he was impeached. Bubba let the polls scare him off of nailing Bin Ladin the 10 times he had a chance. Instead, he went through the fruitless time-wasting process of indicting Osama. Osama burst a kidney from laughing uncontrollably over this cowardly effort. Bill gets NO MERCY for forsaking his country for his own selfish dreams of a legacy.
ECONOMY:
Bush B
Despite war, stuck to tax cut initiative. Economy is strong, but deficit is large. CAN SOMEBODY SHOW THE PRESIDENT HOW TO VETO A SPENDING BILL? STAT!
Clinton B
Wisely signed the Welfare Reform from a Republican Congress. Ironically, that will work for the Republicans since the Nuevo rich will rebel AGAINST the greedy hands of the IRS and vote Republican. Brilliantly took credit for economy based on Republican initiatives. Conveniently forgets about bubble burst in last months of second term preferring to blame his problems on Bush.
HOMELAND SECURITY:
Bush B
Gets high marks after the 9/11. Dubya gets somewhat of a mulligan because no President would have been ready given the neglect of all Presidents since 1979 and especially Clinton in his two scandal ridden terms. Notably there have been no terrorist attacks on the US mainland for 4 ¼ years since 9/11. Says something about the best defense is your offense. Seems he has terrorists bogged down in Baghdad and Kabul, not Boston or Kentucky. Now, WHAT THE HELL IS THE DEAL ON OUR BORDERS?? There's no defense for not putting up a fence.
Clinton F
Terrorists trained in the USA under Clinton's dysfunctional FBI headed up by his pick Louie Freeh. Bubba ignored and despised the CIA, as well as installed a completely useless AG, Janet Reno. Completely missed the relevance of attacks on US soil, embassies, and ships but above all, Osama's declaration of war against the US, Jews, and allies.
COAT-TAILS:
Bush A
Better than his own campaigning skills which have been underrated by opponents and supporters alike is Bush's ability to get other Republicans elected, nationally and Statewide.
Clinton F
There's good and bad about being a Teflon President. The 1994 elections could have been the biggest blow to the Democrats since the assassination of JFK led to 4 Republican Presidents before Dubya beat Bubba's #2 ALGORE.
Final grades:
Bush: A, 3Bs, C, D
Clinton: 3Bs, C, 3Fs
You do the math! Goes to show, "if you can't excel with talent, triumph with effort."
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JWR contributor Dave Weinbaum, originally from Chicago, is a businessman, writer and part-time stand-up comic. He resides in a Midwest red state. Comment by clicking here.
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