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Jewish World Review July 23, 2012/ 5 Menachem-Av, 5772 The 'I didn't write this column,' column By Dave Weinbaum http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | As everyone knows, business owners didn't create their own businesses, but relied on the Native Americans to shoulder—oops, sorry. I inadvertently channeled my inner squaw from senate candidate and apparent spiritual advisor to the President, Indian poser, Elizabeth "Buffalo Dung" Warren. There must be something about the use of old Indian hunting and travel paths that crisscrossed the fruited plains. How many of us who have drive-thrus in our restaurants should owe more taxes because of these original paths—some of which came under the purview of the government for highways? Seems others are infected with that kind of logic. Our President has reiterated that ideology to the rest of us entrepreneurs, business owners and dreamers. Barack preached, "…If you've got a business—you didn't build that. Somebody else made that happen." My parents used to take me to target practice — thank G-d they were lousy shots I think either Obama's on to something or on something. You know that ole homily, "…The hip bone connected to the thigh bone, the thigh bone connected to the backbone…" Although, one wonders how Obama came to the same conclusion as Buffalo Dung Warren. That may be the kind of theory that one contemplates while munching potato chips and Cheetos in a car so full of smoke it would make a Mexican gang-banger buy a gun from Eric Holder and rob it. Thanks for the revelation that unlike what you've accused Romney of doing, you've already admitted to committing numerous felonies. Maybe, Mr. President, if you come up with the names of the drug dealers you bought your coke from, as Mark Levin has suggested, your case to have Romney reveal whatever you think incriminates him as a felon, beyond what the law requires might be relevant. But again I digress. A window of opportunity won't open itself My biggest break, unlike many liberal and minority babies, came when I was born alive. I'm grateful to my mother for not aborting me and my father for not leaving me in the wild to fend for myself--even though I gave him many reasons to do so. He also paid for my college at a bad time in his life when my wrestling scholarship to Denver University fell through the abyss. DU, or as I lovingly call it, Duuuuh disbanded the team for budget cuts—probably because as a private institution they were under too many federal regulations and tax obligations. I became a small business owner soon after my then father-in-law, Van Morris convinced me that it would be a good idea to come in with him and his many partners into the restaurant business. As things worked out, I spent three years managing restaurants with a little ownership thrown in for good measure, often having to work those same seven days a week. That was over 40 years ago. Three years into the business, the franchisor I was involved with offered me a store of my own in Mid Mo that was turned down by all existing franchisees. I jumped on it, surviving while many didn't. Jimmy Carter's big government ruinous interest rates and inflation almost killed my small business, but I survived and thrived in spite of it! Boy, was I happy to see Reagan! As to the old Indian parable that it wasn't me or my employees who created my business, but the infrastructure, protection and other niceties provided by the feds, I have three comments. Those roads, electrical grids, teachers policemen and sidewalks were funded almost exclusively by the very people Obama and Buffalo Dung have demonized, business owners. As someone who never participated in Capitalism, never having run as much as a lemonade stand and never having to make a payroll, Dear Leader doesn't know the first thing about what it takes to make a business succeed. The worst result of Dear Leader's comments is the murder of ambition of those who look to him for leadership and are told that the best way to live is to cheat on taxpayer-funded welfare and food stamps. Sadly, many of those people are in minority communities. I'd say it was a crass attempt to buy their votes as long as they sell their soul to Obama and his ilk—but that's just me. I have it on good authority that if Obama wins a second term the Pledge of Allegiance will be changed to: "I pledge a grievance that brought our flag of the Progressive Nitwits of AmeriKKKa and to the kingdom of Barack Hussein Obama; one third-world country under the UN, with malice and poverty to all." America! TIME TO FIRE THE LIAR! Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here. JWR contributor Dave Weinbaum hosts DaveWeinbaum.com. He is a businessman, writer and part-time stand-up comic and resides in a Midwest red state. Comment by clicking here. Archives © 2011, Dave Weinbaum

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