In this issue

Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review March 11, 2013/ 29 Adar, 5773

Sequester this! Apocalypse not!

By Dave Weinbaum

http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Want irony? The main reason Obama wanted to beat Romney was so that he, the perpetrator of the worst economy since the Depression, could take credit for its recovery.

Too bad he can't celebrate right now. Years ago he cooked up the Sequester scheme based on his feint to cuts he never anticipated giving. The deadline was the end of February this year. He got Republicans to agree with this seemingly draconian measure who naively signed on, anticipating that no sensible government would go without a deal in light of that.

Do these guys go to work every day with a sucker sign glued to their foreheads or what?

After Dear Leader won, he decided he was so powerful and loved that he could continue to con the American people into more tax increases without giving up any spending cuts and blame it on conservatives. When Boehner bleated that the President got his pound of flesh and there would be no more, Obama doubled down, going on another gloom and doom taxpayer-funded tour campaigning across the fruited planes.

Barack made Chicken Little optimistic. He preached an amalgamation of poxes on our country—an Armageddon of nightmares so bad he could then slaughter the entire Republican Party if they didn't cave to his tax-raising demands, thus leaving them vulnerable to losing their last bastion of governance, the House.

He even got his sycophants to regurgitate his ridiculous speculations to a disaster-wary country.

Air travelers were going to suffer huge delays and cancellations, janitors would be laid off, our military would be devastated, teachers would be fired by the thousands, locusts would plague Egypt and mini-asteroids would slam into earth. Okay, so he was right about the bugs and the space rocks—but everything else was bogus!

Just after House Republicans stood up and refused to be blackmailed into coercing even more taxes out of an already set-upon citizenry, the Sequester deadline hit. Finally, unlike with Sandy, Republicans got a break with timing.

We went into Sequestria mode Friday, March first, gritting our teeth and holding our collective breath. After a weekend mini-blizzard, I opened my show that morning singing, I'm dreaming of a white Sequestria, just like the one we had in 1929… It was a celebration. The putzes in the Republican Party finally stood up to the bullies!

Sure enough, the very first Tuesday of the Sequester, the stock market set a new high—only to be repeated the next two days! Barack Hussein Obama cannot take credit for a post-Sequester juggernaut! Now that's irony! I don't care who you are.

Obama hasn't lost all. Here are some of the worst effects of the Sequester —so far:

The hides of March

  • Pigs doing insurance commercials implying sexual relationships with humans.

  • Dennis Rodman as unofficial Secretary of State and new Ambassador to North Korea, garnering nuclear attack threats to the USA from Kim Jong Un.

  • A rote anti-Semite, Chuck Hagel appointed and utilizing Jewish votes in the Senate.

  • Liberal writers being pilloried by the Messiah in Office.

  • The Pope resigns.

  • Obama cancelled White House Tours to our Spring Breaking Youts.

  • Our new Secretary of State, John F. Kerry hands over $190,000,000 of your money to Egypt, a country who hates you and Israel.

  • Janet Napolitano authorizes $50 million in taxpayer money for brand new TSA uniforms so our groping feds can fondle us in style while causing us large post-sequester delays.

Just to show my bipartisanship, allow me to humbly make a few suggestions to President Obama to soften the nightmare of Sequester lest it now affect him in his run for dictator:

1. From now on, call Beyonce collect.

2. Play local public golf courses with the ORFS (Old Retired Farts).

3. Feed Bo regular Alpo instead of imported Japanese Kobe beef.

4. Send the Secret Service packing—unarmed!

5. Buy a muzzle for Biden (nothing to do with saving money— I just wanted to say this.)

6. Turn in the keys to AF1 & AF2.

7. Instead of original showings from Hollywood wait for Netflix like the rest of us Schmucks.

8. Repeal Obamacare.

9. Send a Don't Spend--Across the Board Cut bill to Congress.

10. Early retirement for you and your Administration at full pension. (Trust me—we'll manage without—somehow.)

11. Accept the job offer as Pope even if you have to step down as Messiah.

12. Sell your birth home in Kenya.

13. Have the government sell back the 1.6 billion hollow point bullets and over 2700 domestic tanks they've bought in the last four years.

Feel free to call me or my radio show for more suggestions. You, and only you, Mr. President, can call me collect. Okay Beyoncé, I guess I can make an exception for you too.

The things I'm willing to do for my country!

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

JWR contributor Dave Weinbaum hosts DaveWeinbaum.com. He is a businessman, writer and part-time stand-up comic and resides in a Midwest red state. Comment by clicking here.


© 2011, Dave Weinbaum