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Newt joins Bubba in baggage handlers hall of fame By Dave Weinbaum
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Newt Gingrich is a man on emission.
He's being tailed by the press for
cheating on all his wives and offering
to cheat on now wife, then mistress,
Callista with his then current wife —
who he cheated with on his first wife!
The MSM can't suck enough of these
fumes up! The amazing truth is
Gingrich was (is?) getting more
booty than all the Dem
Presidents combined in the
last 100 years.
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The press is excited 'cause it's like the old days of covering Bill and Hill: only
this time it was okay to spew the bile! OH JOY!! PRAISE SOROS AND
ALINSKY! WE'VE BAGGED THE DIRTY ELEPHANT!
What a bonus to the boring screaming. "Newt's a Progressive!" "Romney's a
Capitalist Pig!" How much better to bray, "NEWT'S AN UNMITIGATED
SLUT!?" With that kind of bumper sticker he could beat Obama in the
Democratic Primaries. Is there still time?
A window of opportunity won't open itself
CNN's John King bit into the bait, rolled by ABC's Brian Ross as he
interviewed one of Newt's ex-wives. Marianne accused Newt of trying to
connive her into an open marriage. He claimed that his paramour, Callista was
jiggy with sharing him. Now there's some First Lady qualifications.
Bill's gotta be pining over that one. No wonder Gingrich and Bubba got on
so well. They must have compared interns and may even have been on the
same paige(s).
When King asked if he minded answering a few questions about Marianne's
salacious discussion, Gingrich set the hook just like the Hemingway's
Old Man and the Sea. He toyed with King -- reeling hard then pausing --
reeling hard then pausing. King, dead in the water, having been deep fried out
of rhetoric then started the debate that was like a one minute sale you're ten
seconds late for. It was already over!
With the South Carolina raising the American Flag on the whoop-ass Gingrich
just dumped on the Liberal Media, Newt solidified himself as the new leader
of the Republican Party. He began this thread earlier in a Fox moderated
debate. Juan Williams race-baited Newt on the question of jobs for minorities,
implying that the Speaker was disrespectful to blacks. Denying any offense
against anyone, Gingrich brought up his daughter Jackie, who at 13, had a
paying janitorial gig for their church.
Not satisfied with Newt's roaring standing "O" from the SC audience,
Williams doubled down. He brought up the race card again! Juan asked if
calling Obama the Food stamp President may have been racist. Newt
denied Juan his Mea Culpa, then said, "…more people have been put on
food stamps by Barack Obama than any president in American history."
He almost brought the house down.
Results? After losing in Iowa and getting squashed in New Hampshire,
Gingrich stood on the shoulders of the Liberal press and beat Romney by
12 in South Carolina. Gingrich, down 20 points in Florida last week is now
leading the polls in Florida by 10. That's a 30 point turnaround!
By the way, the rumor that John King was out purchasing furniture with
Newt the morning after the CNN Debate was squelched when Juan Williams
proudly admitted it was he and Gingrich at Sofas 'R US.
Hate the weed but admire its tenacity
Like Bill, Newt shows how to take a negative issue and run with it. Who
thought Clinton, notorious for his campaigning-non-management (Hmmm
Sound familiar?) could hold on under the adversity of Jennifer Flowers before
the '92 election, Paula Jones, Monica Lewinsky and the woman who accused
him of outright rape, Juanita Broderick. Everybody thought Clinton was
gone —except Clinton. He managed to escape his impeachment conviction,
plead guilty to lying to a Grand Jury in the Paula Jones' case and went on his
way to fix the deficit and sign welfare reform under the tutelage of a chubby
Speaker named Gingrich.
Now Clinton is one of the most respected ex-Presidents by a people with a
notably short memory.
Let's put Newt under the microscope. As I sit here writing this The Brit and
Bret Boys, Hume and Baier are reporting that the Obama Campaign just
issued some scathing documents on Romney, not uttering a syllable on Newt.
Give you one guess who THEY want to run against. (If you're Liberal,
I'll give you two.) Here's some more Newtables:
Still, like Clinton, and yes-even Obama, Newt has passion--and it's
contagious. Romney seems timid at his side. Newt could win.
I just want to know if there's an operation to keep the part of Newt's
brain that wants to make him sit on a couch with Nancy Pelosi and hawk
man-made global warming, frozen.
We need a Newtabotomy STAT! Just don't operate on the wrong side of
that brain.
The free world may be riding on it.
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JWR contributor Dave Weinbaum hosts DaveWeinbaum.com. He is a businessman, writer and part-time stand-up comic and resides in a Midwest red state. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Dave Weinbaum |
Mitch Albom | |||||||||||||
