
 |
|
August 29, 2008
Rabbi Berel Wein: 20/20 sightlessness
Caroline B. Glick: When history is not repeated
JWisdom: Blessed or Cursed: It's Really Up to You by Rabbi Sroy Levitansky
August 28, 2008
Steve Lipman: A Comeback for the 'Jewish Jordan'
Jeffrey Weiss: Researcher reports 'intriguing' diabetes breakthrough
August 27, 2008
Rabbi Zecharya Greenwald: Removing the perfectionist's mask
The Kosher Gourmet
by Emily Nunn: Summer harvest linguine
JWisdom:: The Missing Link in Spiritual Life by Rabbi David Aaron
August 26, 2008
Yaffa Ganz: Grandma gets lessons in staying cool
Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: The Dems' 'soft' jihadist
JWisdom::
Today: Holocaust in the Perspective of Faith by Rabbi Nosson Scherman: Plague of indifference
August 25, 2008
The Jewish Ethicist
by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Q: A friend is bearing a silly grudge from a supposed wrong. What recourse do I have?
Daniel Pipes: Barack Obama through Muslim Eyes
JWisdom:: The knowledge you need to overcome your insecurities by Malka Schulman
August 22, 2008
Rabbi Berel Wein: Life's essential ingredient
Caroline B. Glick: Dominos anyone?
JWisdom:: Actually, Do Sweat the Small Stuff! by Rabbi Sroy Levitansky
August 21, 2008
Today in Biblical History
by Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Popularization of Kabbalah: 20 Menachem-Av 1558 CE
Jonathan Rosenblum: Lessons from the Beyond
JWisdom: : The Olympian within is rooting for you -- yes, you! –- to go for the gold
August 20, 2008
Jonathan Tobin: Misleading Platform Platitudes
The Kosher Gourmet
by Linda Gassenheimer: Chicken Salad with Asian Dressing
JWisdom: The Holocaust in the Perspective of Faith: America's Defense of the Jews --- Until WWII by Rabbi Nosson Scherman
August 19, 2008
Dennis Prager: If the Almighty doesn't exist
Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: Obama's Islamist problem has nothing to do with his upbringing
JWisdom:
Think your life is messed up? by Rabbi David Aaron
August 18, 2008
The Jewish Ethicist
by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Business with Friends
Diana West: Roars About Russia, Bare Whispers About Islam
JWisdom: Relationship agony: The real cause by Malka Schulman
August 15, 2008
Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski: To love the Divine
Caroline B. Glick: Georgia, Israel, and the nature of man
JWisdom: The Truly Righteous Don't Demand Entitlements by Rabbi Sroy Levitansky
August 14, 2008
Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Confessions of broken spirit
Libby Lazewnik: The Numbers Game
JWisdom: Six Questions You'll Be Asked in Heaven? - Uh - Let's Just Take One for Now! by Gavriel Aryeh Sanders
August 13, 2008
Jonathan Tobin: Georgia should be on their minds
The Kosher Gourmet
by Linda Gassenheimer: Go Greek: Pair flavorful lamb kebabs with a hearty salad
JWisdom: Human hybrids aren't science fiction by Rabbi David Aaron
August 12, 2008
Rabbi Avi Shafran: Bless us
Daniel Pipes: The West's Islamist Infiltrators
JWisdom: From Sadness to Gladness: The Route from Tisha b'Av to Rosh Hashana by Rabbi Mordechai Becher
August 11, 2008
The Jewish Ethicist
by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: A Jewish view on fair pricing
Caroline B. Glick: Ignoring failure in Gaza
JWisdom: 'Communication' Is Not The Answer! by Malka Schulman
August 7, 2008
Rabbi David Gutterman: A Continuing Story With a Sustaining Goal
Rabbi Berel Wein: Mourning and morning
JWisdom: Yes, we are still in exile by Rabbi Sroy Levitansky
August 6, 2008
David Ashenfelter: Government made military engineer's life a living hell because of his faith, Defense Department report documents
Jonathan Tobin: Speak the Truth; Defeat the Lies
JWisdom: Jewish Spirituality: Fusion or Confusion? by Rabbi David Aaron
August 5, 2008
Chris Leppek: Church/state wall beginning to crumble?
Paul Greenberg: Exit Olmert (no encore, please)
JWisdom: Serenity: Make the commitment by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin (Read by Gavriel Sanders)
August 4, 2008
The Jewish Ethicist by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: Am I taking advantage of another's psychological quirk?
Andrew Silow-Carroll: A black and a Jew walk into the White House…
JWisdom: The Holocaust in the Perspective of Faith: Edward R. Morrow visits the ‘living dead’ by Rabbi Nosson Scherman
August 1, 2008
Rabbi A. Henach Leibowitz: We have the power to alter another's destiny use it well
Caroline B. Glick: Why Olmert finally did it
JWisdom: Life By The (Book of) Numbers by Rabbi Sroy Levitansky
July 31, 2008
This Week in Biblical History
by Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Ezra the Scribe returns from exile
Joan Verdon: Demure is in demand: More brides seek 'modest' gowns
JWisdom: You don't have to be ‘compatible’ to have a stable, happy relationship by Malka Shulman
July 30, 2008
Jonathan Tobin: Does Israel need 'tough love'?
The Kosher Gourmet
by Gail Borelli: Pickling captures the fleeting tastes of summer's fruits and vegetables
JWisdom:
Serenity: It's Really Up to YOU! by Rabbi Zelig Pliskin (Read by Gavriel Sanders)
July 29, 2008
Rabbi Avi Shafran: Good things happen
Dick Morris: How Israel's race could shift ours
JWisdom: Holocaust in the Perspective of Faith by Rabbi Nosson Scherman: Equal but Not Jewish or Jewish but Not Human?
July 28, 2008
The Jewish Ethicist
by Rabbi Dr. Asher Meir: How and when to lie
Steven Emerson: More Perils of Interfaith Dialogue
JWisdom:: A TripTik for Your Spiritual Journey by Rabbi Dovid Gross
March 22, 2007
J-Rhythms with Avraham Rosenblum: JWR's cutting-edge music program showcasing performers -- singers, song writers, musicians, and bands -- who learn and live the Torah lifestyle (OUR NEWEST IGODCAST !)
Oct. 29, 2003
Mortimer B. Zuckerman: Graffiti On History's Walls (MUST-READ!)
|
| |
Jewish World Review
July 10, 2006
/ 14 Tamuz, 5766
Ireland, land of bad Elvis
By
Dave Barry
| 
|
|
|
|
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
I recently spent a week in Ireland, and I can honestly say that I have never been to any place in the world where it's so easy to partake of the local culture, by which I mean beer. Ireland also contains history, nice people, enormous quantities of scenery and a rich cultural heritage, including (more on this later) Elvis.
Geographically, Ireland is a medium-sized rural island that is slowly but steadily being consumed by sheep. It consists mostly of scenic pastures occasionally interrupted by quaint towns with names such as (these are actual Irish town names) Ardfert, Ballybunion, Coole, Culleybackey, Dingle, Dripsey, Emmoo, Feakle, Fishguard, Gweedore, Inch, Knockaderry, Lack, Leap, Lusk, Maam, Meentullynagarn, Muff, Newmarket-on-Fergus, Nutt's Corner, Oola, Pontoon, Rear Cross, Ringaskiddy, Screeb, Sneem, Spiddle, Spink, Stradbally, Tang and Tempo.
These towns are connected by a modern, state-of-the-art system of medieval roads about the width of a standard bar of hotel soap; the result is that motorists drive as fast as possible in hopes of getting to their destinations before they meet anybody coming the other way. The only thing that prevents everybody from going 120 mph is the nationwide system probably operated by the Ministry of Traffic Safety of tractors being driven very slowly by old men wearing caps; you encounter these roughly every two miles, rain or shine, day or night. As an additional safety measure, the roads are also frequented by herds of cows, strolling along and mooing appreciatively at the countryside, reminding you very much of tour groups.
A typical Irish town consists of several buildings, one of which is always a bar, called a "pub." Next to this there will typically be another pub, which is adjacent to several more pubs. Your larger towns may also have a place that sells food, but this is not critical.
Inside the pubs, you will usually find Irish people, who are very friendly to strangers, especially compared with the British, who as a rule will not voluntarily speak to you until you have lived in Britain for a minimum of 850 years. The Irish, on the other hand, will quickly start a conversation with you, and cheerfully carry it on at great length, with or without your help.
One evening, in a busy Dublin pub, I watched an elderly, well-dressed, cap-wearing gentleman as he sat in the corner and, for two solid hours, struck up a lively conversation with every single person or group who sat within 10 yards of him, including a group of German tourists, only one of whom spoke even a little English. The man spoke to them in a thick brogue on a variety of topics for several minutes while they looked at him with the bright, polite smiles of people who do not have a clue what is being said to them. When he finished, they conferred briefly in German, and then the one who spoke a little English said, quote, "Everyone is pleased that he or she is welcome."
You definitely feel welcome in Ireland. But there's more to do there than just talk to Irish people in pubs. You can also drive around the countryside, alternately remarking "Look, sheep!" and "Here's another tractor!" You can visit a bunch of old castles built by the Normans, who at one point conquered Ireland despite being called the "Normans," which is, let's face it, not an impressive-sounding name. It's kind of like being conquered by the "Freds."
Probably the best-known castle is the one in the town of Blarney, which contains the famous Blarney Stone. To get to it, you have to climb steep, narrow, tourist-infested steps to the top of the castle; there, a local man holds you as you lean out over the castle wall and kiss the Blarney Stone. Legend has it that if you do this, you will give the man a tip.
Also at a castle in a town called Kilkenny I saw a local radio station doing a live remote broadcast, featuring a Frozen Food Challenge in which a resident had to answer a multiple-choice question on the history of refrigeration. She got it right, and won a hamper of frozen foods.
"Brilliant!" she said.
But in my opinion the cultural highlight of the trip occurred in the town of Ennis, where a pub called Brandon's had a sign outside that said "Traditional Irish Music." This turned out to be a traditional Irish Elvis impersonator. I realize that there are literally thousands of quality Elvis impersonators, and I'm sure you've seen some excellent ones, but I am here to tell you that this one, in this unremarkable town in western Ireland, was beyond question the worst Elvis impersonator in world history.
He sang along to a tape of instrumental Elvis tunes, which he played on a sound system that he never, not once in two solid hours, got adjusted right. Every time he'd start singing a song, the sound system would screech and honk with feedback; Elvis would then whirl around and spend minutes at a time unsuccessfully adjusting various knobs while he mumbled the lyrics, so that for most of the evening all you saw was Elvis' butt, accompanied by screeching and honking and vague off-key singing.
Often, by the time he'd finished twiddling the knobs, Elvis had lost track of what song he was singing; he'd frown into the distance, trying various tunes until he thought he was on the right track, at which point the screeching and honking would start up, forcing Elvis to whirl back around, like a man being attacked by bees, and treat the audience to another lengthy view of his butt. The crowd, which I will frankly admit was consuming alcoholic beverages, enjoyed this performance immensely, cheering wildly at the end of each song. They like their fun, the Irish. I'm definitely going back some day. Maybe I'll rent a tractor.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
Comment by clicking here.
Previously:
Mr. Peabrain's misadventures
When they're out to get you, keep cool
Mothers of invention
Kill 'em with kindness
© 2006, The Miami Herald Distributed by Tribune Media Services, Inc.
|
|

Mitch Albom
Michael Barone
Dave Barry
Tony Blankley
Andy Borowitz
David Broder
Stratfor Briefing
Mona Charen
Linda Chavez
Ann Coulter
Greg Crosby
Rod Dreher
Larry Elder
Suzanne Fields
John Fund
Frank J. Gaffney
Lloyd Garver
Jonah Goldberg
Michael Goodwin
Julia Gorin
Jonathan Gurwitz
Paul Greenberg
Victor Davis Hanson
Betsy Hart
Nat Hentoff
David Horowitz
Laura Ingraham
Jeff Jacoby
Paul Johnson
Jack Kelly
James Klurfeld
Ed Koch
Ch. Krauthammer
Jonathan Last
Michael Ledeen
John Leo
David Limbaugh
Kathryn Lopez
Rich Lowry
Michelle Malkin
Jackie Mason
The Medicine Men
Dick Morris
Bill O'Reilly
Clarence Page
Kathleen Parker
Dennis Prager
Wesley Pruden
Tom Purcell
Jonathan Rauch
Celia Rivenbark
Robert Robb
Cokie & Steve Roberts
Pat Sajak
Debra J. Saunders
Culture Shlock
Roger Simon
Michael Smerconish
Thomas Sowell
Mark Steyn
John Stossel
Cal Thomas
Jonathan Tobin
Bob Tyrrell
Diana West
Dave Weinbaum
George Will
Walter Williams
Mort Zuckerman

Robert Arial
Chuck Asay
Chip Bok
Dry Bones
Lisa Benson
John Branch
Gary Brookins
John Cole
Paul Combs
J. D. Crowe
John Deering
Brian Duffy
Everything's Relative
Mallard Fillmore
Jake Fuller
Bob Gorrel
Joe Heller
David Hitch
Jerry Holber
Steve Kelley
Jeff Koterba
Dick Locher
Chan Lowe
Ranan R. Lurie
Jimmy Margulies
Rick McKee
Michael Ramirez
Jeff Stahler
Danna Summers
John Trever
Gary Varvel
Kirk Walters

How 2
Know-It-All
Lori Borgman
The Savvy Consumer
Elder matters
Fixit
Dr. Peter Gott
Marybeth Hicks
GET A JOB! by Marty Nemko
Richard Lederer
Tech Maven
Nutrition Myths
Supermarket Shopper
Bruce Williams
How Stuff Works
|