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February 13, 2012
Binyamin Rose: Back to the Bunker: How a life-risking act by a Christian family during the Holocaust saved a family and built a thriving community a world away
Menachem Wecker: Business Schools Teach Real Estate Despite Troubled Housing Market
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David G. Savage: Why activists may not be in a hurry to have High Court rule on alternative marriage
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Laura McMullen: 10 Least Expensive Public Schools for Out-of-State Students
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Warren Richey: Why momentous Prop. 8 ruling might not satisfy gay-rights groups
Menachem Wecker: Though Controversial, LL.M.'s Can Lead to Specialized Legal Jobs
The Kosher Gourmet byDana Velden: Going to the bother of making soup? You know it better be good. This CREAM OF TOMATO SOUP certainly is! And it's a cinch to make, too (Includes techinques and serving secrets)
February 7, 2012
Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: Caught off-guard? President's Super Bowl interview with Matt Lauer gives those who need a reason not to vote for him, a darn good one
Suzanne Bohan: Leaping lizards! Tiny reptiles advancing robot design
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Jonathan Tobin: Iran Threatens Israel With Destruction, But the New York Times Doesn't Hear It
Jeffrey Fleishman: In newly democratic Egypt, tens of democracy activists jailed, to stand trial; their groups are 'threatening the stability of the homeland'
Julie Deardorff : Researchers say antioxidants may not be that effective and could do more harm than good
Mark Clayton: How did Anonymous hackers eavesdrop on FBI and Scotland Yard?
February 3, 2012
Edmund Sanders : Israeli official says Iran is creating missile that could reach East Coast of US
Victoria Kim: Immigrant-smuggling ring used black drivers to avoid racial profiling
February 2, 2012
Jim Carney: Wrong number call may have saved her life
Reza Kahlili : Ex-CIA spy in Iran's Revolutionary Guard: What Obama doesn't grasp about striking deals with Tehran
Tina Susman: For woodchuck rescuer, every day is Groundhog Day
February 1, 2012
Brian Bennett: US officials see increasing threat of domestic attack from Iran
Emily Brandon: How to Take Advantage of New 401(k) Fee Disclosures
January 31, 2012
January 30, 2012
Paul Richter and Ramin Mostaghim: Misreading Teheran's limits -- deadly and economically devastating as they may be -- is a risk administration, Europe seem willing to take
Suzanne Bohan: Warning: Nap-deprived tots missing more than sleep, study finds
Meg Handley: Banks Revamping Rewards Programs to Woo Customers
January 27, 2012
Caroline B. Glick: Obama: Of course I intend to prevent a nuclear holocaust . . . in a few months
Yochonon Donn: In liberal New York City, fervently-Orthodox Jews may soon be getting a district to call their own
Jeannine Stein: An inflated ego and thinking you're 'all that' doesn't just make others sick of you, it can make you ill
Katy Hopkins: New budget rules may affect how much money you get for college
January 26, 2012
Ed Koch: To the New York Times, calling for the murder of Jews by those capable of having their incitement taken seriously isn't news
Jeannine Stein: Mental illness struck one in five U.S. adults in 2010: Report
January 25, 2012
Richard Simon: House passes two bills endorsing the use of religious symbols at military memorials
Fred Weir: Putin: Multiethnic Russia cannot survive as a US-style 'melting pot'; must find its own way
Susan Johnston: 5 Sneaky Coupon Strategies Consumers Should Watch Out For
January 24, 2012
Carol Clark: The price of your soul: How your brain decides whether to 'sell out'
Caroline B. Glick: America lost most in 'Arab Spring'. Sadly, many voters still don't grasp the extent
Warren Richey: Drug criminal scores win in GPS ruling from conservative-leaning high court
Erika Bolstad: Black conservatives gather to talk about gaining strength
January 23, 2012
Melissa Dribben: Jewish voters to play a key role in Florida's Republican primary
Jordan Rau: In quest to grow, Catholic hospital system will announce this morning its break from church
Ali Safi: U.S. envoy gives Taliban terms for peace talks
January 19, 2012
January 18, 2012
January 17, 2012
Frank J. Gaffney Jr.: No-kidding red lines: U.S. response to an Iranian nuke may be bluster, but Israel's won't be
David G. Savage: They sued their principals after slandering them online --- now the cases are headed to the Supreme Court
David Francis: Where to Invest in 2012: With stocks expected to rebound, opportunity abounds for investors
January 13, 2012
Ben Lynfield: Israeli lawmakers move to annex Jewish Judea, one museum at a time
Alexia Elejalde-Ruiz: Thriving through touch: Gentle massage helps older people with low mobility improve in mind and body
January 12, 2012
Warren Richey: Landmark Supreme Court ruling a 'resounding win' for religious groups
Warren Richey: Supreme Court says no to new rule on eyewitness testimony
John Fauber : Statins found to raise diabetes risk in postmenopausal women
Katy Hopkins : Consider This Before You Pay for an Online Degree
The Kosher Gourmet by Joseph Erdos: This mushroom and barley soup has an intense -- almost nutty -- flavor that mixes robust with Middle East. It has creaminess without cream
January 11, 2012
Shari Roan: Millions of atrial fibrillation sufferers at risk for devastating, but preventable, stroke
Tom Hussain: Pakistan -- recipient of more than $21 billion in civilian and military aid -- speeds pursuit of Iranian pipeline, defying US
David G. Savage: High court signals it won't be loosening TV's 'indecency' rules
Stephen Ceasar: Oklahoma's Islamic law amendment can't go into effect, court rules
January 10, 2012
Reza Kahlili: From an ex-CIA spy: US must exploit new split in Iran's Revolutionary Guard
Karen Kaplan: Study: Nicotine replacement products ineffective when used in real-life situations
January 9, 2012
Michael Doyle: Put through legal hell over dream home, couple fought back hard --- all the way to Supreme Court
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Jewish World Review
April 2, 2007
/ 14 Nissan, 5767
Percentage of frogs in food jumps
By
Dave Barry
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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
It's getting worse.
When I say "it," I am referring to the worldwide epidemic of frogs showing up in food, which I documented recently, describing two worldwide incidents, one involving a frog baked onto a pretzel, and the other involving a frog in a frozen Chicken Cantonese dinner. When I say "is getting worse," I'm referring to a shocking new development that occurred recently in Orange, Calif., according to a superb story in the Orange County Register, written by Lori Basheda and sent in by many alert readers.
The story states that a man named Patrick McGowan and his family were eating at a chain restaurant called El Torito. McGowan had ordered the No. 7 combo, and noticed that the taco "was chewier than it ought to be."
"So I spit it out and there was a frog," McGowan is quoted as saying. "I couldn't believe it. I bit the damn head off."
The McGowans said they asked for a manager, but nobody showed up, so Marlaina McGowan started walking around informing the other diners: "I wouldn't eat here. There's frogs in the food."
A manager then appeared, and after a "tug of war" with the McGowans, wound up taking the frog away. The McGowans demanded custody of the frog but the restaurant refused to surrender it.
"We want to have it checked for diseases," Marlaina McGowan is quoted as saying. "We called our doctor and he said, 'Get the frog.'"
If you know anything at all about the United States of America, then you know what happened next; namely, lawyers materialized. According to Basheda's follow-up story, the McGowans' attorney sent El Torito a letter stating: "The frog pieces will be crucial evidence if this matter proceeds to litigation. You are advised to maintain custody of the frog and insure that it is not lost, altered or destroyed in any manner."
An El Torito company spokesperson told the Register: "We're not commenting on the location of the frog. It is undergoing testing at a reputable independent lab."
As of this writing, we do not know the results of the testing. But we do know that we now have documented cases of frogs showing up in three major food groups: 1) the restaurant group, 2) the frozen-food group and 3) the pretzel group. Only an idiot would believe this is coincidence. This is clearly a case of frogs, acting in concert, infiltrating our food supply. And if you are not alarmed about this, then you obviously have never had a friend or loved one expire from a frog-transmitted disease.
How can you, the consumer, protect yourself? You can be very suspicious, especially if you're eating at a swank restaurant operated by French people, who are known to deliberately put frogs, and sometimes even snails, into food, then disguise them with so-called "French" names such as "escargot" (which means, literally, "They are paying to eat this! Ha ha!"). When ordering at such a restaurant, make sure you ask your waiter probing questions about the menu ("Pierre, this so-called 'fromage' any frogs in that?"). When your food arrives, examine it closely by flashlight and do not hesitate to take precautions ("Hey, Pierre, how about you take the first bite of these so-called 'legumes.'").
When preparing your own food at home, be sure to check the list of ingredients carefully and not just for frogs. I say this because recently an alert reader named Gary Osburn sent me a food product, which he purchased in Singapore, called I am not making this up "Thick Soup of Snake."
The information on the Thick Soup of Snake box is printed in both Chinese and a language that is sort of, but not quite, English. For example, the box states that in addition to "snake meat," the ingredients include "hot perfume" and "special doing first-class soup material."
In an act of unselfish journalistic courage, for which I should get, at minimum, a Nobel Prize, I actually made Thick Soup of Snake, with the help of my son, Rob. This was not easy, because the directions (or, as the box calls them, the "Food of way") include such statements as: "Allocate the materials becoming starch shape with the a little cold water," and "you will get a pot of heavy fragrance."
I'll say we did. I do not believe I have ever experienced a fragrance that heavy outside of an unserviced portable toilet.
"What would it take to get you to eat this?" I asked Rob.
"A new car," he said.
But I was determined to try it. I got a spoonful of Thick Soup of Snake and brought it to my lips.
"I'm going to throw up," I told Rob.
"No, you won't," he said, helpfully. "Just forget it's snake."
I finally ate a little bit, and so did Rob, and we agreed that once you get past the fact that it smells disgusting and looks like something that had been swept from the floor of a stable full of very sick horses it is truly awful. I honestly think I would prefer frog.
But the point is that we're having an epidemic, and until it's over, you should be very careful about what you eat. You should consume only those foods that it would be difficult for reptiles or amphibians to hide in. Probably your safest bet is to eat nothing but M&Ms. And even then, you should steer clear of the green ones.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
Comment by clicking here.
Previously:
Night of the living roach
Mr. Language Person: Some words of wisdomality
Mind your P's and Q's and teas
Loose lips sink sequels
NOW WE'RE COOKIN'!
The right to Bear clubs
Science: It's just not fair
Road warrior specials
Where's the beef? (Low fat)
There is nothing like a male (guys)
MOTIVATE! THEN FAIL! NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS
Rooting for the midgets of the Midway
Revolt of the rodents
He can drive any truck named Tonka
All bets are off
How do you spell S-A-T?
Sour grapes and mud
Pro golf: A game of non-stop boredom
Guard-dog vigilance is nothing to sniff at
Warm and fuzzy Cold War memories
The funny side of Beowulf
HOLY HEAT WAVE, BATMAN!
Abs-olute madness
Beware of brainy bugs
I'm in a sorry state
The frog plague: The inside story
If she had a hammer….
Keeping an eye on crime
Camping and Lewis and Clark
When in Iowa, don't forget to duck
Junior takes the wheel
Growing old with Dave
Sites for sore eyes
Beware of sheep droppings
Ireland, land of bad Elvis
Mr. Peabrain's misadventures
When they're out to get you, keep cool
Mothers of invention
Kill 'em with kindness
© 2006, The Miami Herald Distributed by Tribune Media Services, Inc.
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