Jewish World Review August 2, 2011 / 2 Menachem-Av, 5771
Sales Department --- Barack Obama, Manager
By Paul Greenberg
As our president explained in terms any fool can understand, if only fools, this whole tangle in
Let me explain. Take it from the old house-to-house encyclopedia salesman I was for a few ill-fated weeks one summer between college terms. Or rather let the president explain: All this foofaraw, brouhaha, capital-C Crisis and general consternation in
What responsible citizen wouldn't pay his bills, or be against the government's paying its? That's why the debt limit needs to be raised by the close of business today. No more of this hemming and hawing and partisan bickering. Quick. While there's still time to save our credit and avoid higher interest rates. Have your senators and representatives sign right here on the dotted lie before it's too late -- before they leave the used-car lot, or rather the U.S. Capitol. Time's a-wastin'. Been a-wastin'.
It's really quite simple when you think about it. (And even simpler when you don't.) Let's use the kind of homey, around-the-kitchen table metaphor that this president likes to roll out when he displays his best Fireside Chat manner. Let's talk about it in terms of your family finances:
When your credit card maxes out, why sweat and fret? Just extend your credit limit. Or apply for another card and start all over again. It's the
There's no need to change your spending habits, just your credit limit. And … Voila! All your problems disappear. ("I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today!" --
OK, so there may be a little drawback here and there to the Obama theory of credit economics. Like having to pay a little more interest. Or finding one of those credit-card companies or payday lenders who'll charge you slightly more, like an arm and a leg, for a loan that's now considered high-risk.
In that case, what about a second or third mortgage on your house? You don't think anybody will ever actually foreclose on it someday, do you? Even if they do, someday is a long way off. In the meantime, why not eat, drink and make merry? Odds are the piper'll never insist on being paid. Not if you promise to pay him even more in the future.
Actually, you're being quite responsible by going deeper into debt. You've already bought all this stuff; now you're just looking for a way to pay for it, see? Who could argue with that?
So sign right here on the dotted line to extend your credit. Easy terms! No waiting! Nothing to pay till 2013, by which time the next presidential election will be safely past. And that was really the president's prime consideration in all this politicking, wasn't it? In the meantime, live a little!
One final thought: If the current president of
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