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April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review May 10, 2013/ 1 Sivan, 5773

Retro Moms Discover a Mother's Mystique

By Suzanne Fields




http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Mother's Day approaches, and children are decorating cards with ribbons and lace and wrapping boxes of chocolates. Just how we celebrate depends on the length of our memories. Those closest to adolescence recall the anger of rebellion, when we were sure we knew more than our mothers. The older we get the wiser our mothers become. When we become mothers ourselves, we suddenly hear her voice in our own, in the familiar things we say to our own children: "I'll count to three," or, "You're wearing that?" or, "No, you don't look fat."

Mothers of sons who died on both sides in the Civil War organized a first day to honor mothers as a way to inspire the reuniting of North and South, but it was not celebrated as an official holiday until it was recognized in West Virginia in 1908. Other states quickly followed, and President Woodrow Wilson officially proclaimed the holiday in 1914, six years before women got the vote.

We've marched a long way since then. We mock the second Sunday in May for its sentimentality and commercialization, but when a mother's voice is stilled, her sons and daughters grieve that the full understanding of a mother's wisdom arrived too late to thank her for it.

So it's a good day for sentiment, and it's a good day for hardheaded realism, too. The way parents share responsibility has changed over the last five decades. The Pew Research Center confirms what most of us know: Dad is doing more housework, but not nearly as much as Mom. Both share the care of children, but Mom does more.

More dads than moms work full-time. This research supports the findings of economists June and Dave O'Neill, who write in their new book, "The Declining Importance of Race and Gender in the Labor Market," that the gender gap in wages is related to different choices women make, not discrimination. Mothers are "more likely to work part-time, to take more career breaks than men, to accumulate fewer years of continuous work experience," and childless women "who never marry earn more than married women and as much as similarly situated men."

Fathers place more importance on a high-paying job; women want a flexible schedule. In the Pew survey, only 23 percent of married mothers say they would like to work full-time — an attitude unchanged since 2007.

In the life-is-not-fair department, feminist fury was unleashed against Marissa Mayer, when the CEO of Yahoo built a nursery in her office for her newborn but required mothers who work for her to come into the office to share the collaborative team dynamic.

Bottom lines are not about changing diapers. The controversy loudly acknowledged the dilemma of working mothers, which has not entered the consciousness of working fathers. Few men are signing up for the feminist suggestion that men take the title of "feminist housedude."

Feminism is fading because women in their prime earning years are distracted by the urge to procreate, and after that to supervise the upbringing of their children.

Lisa Miller argues in New York magazine that educated, married mothers "far from the Bible Belt's conservative territories, in blue state cities and suburbs," are giving up sitting around the kitchen table with their friends railing about glass ceilings and not having it all: "They are too busy mining their grandmothers' old-fashioned lives for values they can appropriate like heirlooms they wear proudly as their own." They see domesticity as a career, cameos in a digital age.

Retro moms draw attention to what Betty Friedan, the godmother of modern feminism, missed, that satisfied full-time mothers liked their lives of domesticity and didn't want to trade them for the dissatisfactions of the workaday grind.

This is not a retreat but an "active awakening." They want to enjoy the division of labor in a marriage, with the man bringing home the money for the bread. If Mom doesn't bake the bread, the bakery has lots of healthy choices. More women, even liberal women, are homeschooling their children. Homeschoolers have grown by 10 percent over the past year in New York City.

Retro mothers know they're privileged, and not only because of what their husbands earn. Most of these "retro families" have incomes of $100,000 a year or more, but the women measure their lives in long-range dividends.

Kelly Makino, 33, a New York mother of two young children, ages 2 and 5, considers herself a feminist and a "flaming liberal" who relishes the power she wields from home: "I know this investment in my family will be paid back when the time is ripe."

No doubt. Happy Mother's Day.

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© 2006, Creators Syndicate, Suzanne Fields

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