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December 2, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review Feb. 22, 2013/ 12 Adar, 5773

Genderfication of Adolescence

By Suzanne Fields




http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Not so long ago, "gender" was something mostly of interest to flirtatious nouns. But then, as the culture became both more vulgar and more squeamish, "gender" replaced "sex" as the distinction between "him" and "her." Now "date," which described how him and her got acquainted, is replaced by "hook up."

Gender used to tell us about language; now, it describes behavioral roles. The word sex was unambiguous, referring to the natural biological differences. But the genderfication of sex expands to encompass the experiences of the transgendered, lesbian and male homosexuals.

Whereas sex refers to two, gender creates a crowd — emotional attachment becomes more about attitude than intimate connection. While most adults can handle the changes, however reluctantly, the ambiguity that language expresses affects our children in a different way, confusing their psychological perceptions and judgments in new ways. Sex that was once vulnerably personal has been coolly objectified in gender.

Relationships between the sexes have never been easy — a mix of biological determinants, cultural expectations and personal spontaneity. Norms, or conventions, were meant to keep us in line. They were often abusive, favoring the male patriarch with power through property and aggressive aggrandizement, both physically and materially. But the sexual revolution changed all that. Once the pill arrived, women were liberated from fear of pregnancy, and were soon on their own to control their relationships with men.

But few of us expected that liberation would reach down to our children before they reached maturity. But now it does. Titillation teased out in the flirtation of getting to know another person has been trivialized and reduced to the animal sensation of "doing it," even among post-pubescents. You can see this expressed by teenagers who have discovered the "hookup," which sounds as mechanical as it is.

The "hookup" was originally defined on elite campuses where the workload was heavy and a sexual relationship was thought to be too time-consuming. The "hookup" was quick, so that each participant was free to get on with other, more important things.

But the hookup has filtered down to high school as an accepted way to behave. Here's a sample example, as explained in the Valentine's Day issue of a school newspaper at an expensive private high school in the nation's capital. The author of the piece offers typical interviews and observations on the state of romance among young urban sophisticated teenagers:

"High school students already have so much going on with school, homework and extracurriculars that it is hard to find time to really commit in a relationship," says an earnest young woman in defense of the latest social norm. "Hookups are the perfect remedy."

Typically, two people who have hooked up the night before, but who see each other in school the next day, "pretend it never happened." Hookups provide fun without burdens, the latest variation of "no strings attached," which was once the province of the rogue and the roue whom mothers warned their daughters about.

The teenage years, acknowledged by generations of acne-threatened girls and boys as a stage for "identity crises," have been replaced with pseudo sophistication, abetted by the popular culture and social media that glamorizes parties, alcohol, one-night stands and "friends with benefits."

No doubt this generation, like those before it, will confront life with a mix of experiences of tender agonies and heady excitement and pass through to maturity without too many psychological bruises. After all, growing up is a tough testing ground, an obstacle course with high hurdles to be surmounted. No one would wish back the bad old days of repression and double standards rigidly imposed by cultural institutions.

But what's strikingly absent in accounts of the new "gender" attitudes of adolescents is an authentic appreciation of sensuality and mystery that propels the male and female to seek intimacy and understanding. Without rules for sexual behavior, an uninspired hedonism dulls the senses, removing the wonder and titillation of mutual attraction.

The sexual revolution that pulled aside the cloak of discretion over the sexual experience has erased some of the rewarding, secret, subtle, psychological discoveries for young people. Sex may be a desire as natural as the need for food, but hookups reduce sexual experience to McSex, the moral equivalent of fast food.

Every revolution pushes the pendulum, and we never see where the center belongs until the pendulum has swung too far. The sexual revolution, which now deprives the next generation of the emotional tools required for growing up with a sensitivity to others as well as for self, has swung too far. Where and when it stops and begins the return arc, none can tell. But return it must. Civilization, and the nouns, are counting on it.

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© 2006, Creators Syndicate, Suzanne Fields

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