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April 21, 2014

Andrew Silow-Carroll: Passoverkill? Suggestions to make next year's seders even more culturally sensitive

Sara Israelsen Hartley: Seeking the Divine: An ancient connection in a new context

Christine M. Flowers: Priest's execution in Syria should be call to action

Courtnie Erickson: How to help kids accept the poor decisions of others

Lizette Borreli: A Glass Of Milk A Day Keeps Knee Arthritis At Bay

Lizette Borreli: 5 Health Conditions Your Breath Knows Before You Do

The Kosher Gourmet by Betty Rosbottom Coconut Walnut Bars' golden brown morsels are a beautifully balanced delectable delight

April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review Jan. 3, 2013/ 22 Teves, 5773

Entitlement Parking

By Greg Crosby



http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | I guess I just don't live right or something. Unlike some of my fellow citizens, I'm not entitled to use the best parking spots in the shopping malls. In case you haven't been paying attention, take a look the next time you wind up driving around and around through the parking structure searching for a vacant space at the mall. You'll notice that every spot is takenů.with the exception of a certain bunch of "entitlement parking spaces." Many of these spots are open, but unless you are one of the politically correct chosen ones, you're not allowed to park there.

The most common "entitlement spots" are the ones that are reserved for drivers with either a "Handicapped" license plate or a "Handicapped" plastic thing-a-ma-bob that hangs on the rearview mirror in the car. People who have these special passes range from the truly disabled to some young wise guy driving an $85,000 BMW who conned his doctor into writing a prescription for a handicapped plate. Since I don't fall into either of these categories (or anything in-between), I can't park there.

Then we have the special space designated for "Electric Cars Only." I don't happen to own an electric car, I don't want an electric car (especially the GM Volt flop), and therefore I can't park in the electric car spots. Okay, fair enough. I don't have any problem with malls providing special spots for the tree hugger/ environ-mental-cases among us to park and plug in their silly electric cars. But there's the thing, why are these spots up front, close to the entrance? Last time I checked, the environmentalists aren't handicapped (at least not so you'd notice). If anything, they should be parking at the far end of the structure, that way they can walk a little bit, you know, to bring down their carbon footprints.

Not to be outdone by the electric cars and handicapped, we now add "Expectant Mothers" to the list of entitlement parking spaces. Now does "expectant mothers" mean pregnant women only, or does that apply to any woman who EXPECTS to be pregnant at some time in the future? Okay, I'm being a bit facetious here, I know it means pregnant women, but at what point in the pregnancy? The first month? The first week? The first day?

Correct me if I'm wrong (and I know you will, dear readers) but aren't women who are in the early stages of pregnancy still going to work, still exercising, still doing just about any physical activity that they did before they became pregnant? Why do they need a special close spot near the entrance to the mall? Hey, if they are so unable to walk a little bit why are they going shopping to begin with? And here's another thing, once they enter the mall don't they have to walk? Or do they have special motorized golf carts for the expectant mothers to drive around in? I never saw those.

The newest entitlement space is, I kid you not, the ones marked for "Mothers with Children." That's right, all mommies and kiddies get to park closest to the mall entrance now. Remember the old rule of the sea, that if the ship is going down it is women and children first into the lifeboats? Well, the same goes for the shopping mall. All you idiot men drive up to the top level of the parking structure and walk. There are no stores for you in the mall anyway so what are you doing here? Go home.

And how come fathers with children don't rate a close spot to park? We keep hearing that there are many stay-at-home dads these days and many moms are the primary breadwinners, so why don't Fathers with Children get the same parking privileges as Mothers with Children? What happened to equal rights? Oh, I guess its only equal rights for certain people. That makes sense.

How come old people don't get the close parking spots? Why should an eighty year-old have to park further away then a twenty-two year-old who is in her first month of pregnancy? And how come fat people don't get to park closer, isn't it more difficult for them to walk and breathe than skinny people?

If I really put my mind to it, I can probably think of a lot of other groups of people that should be included in entitlement parking. Eventually we could include almost everybody, but then the entire parking structure would be entitlement parking and entitlement parking for all means entitlement parking for none. Hmmm. Just like it was in the good old days.

To recap, I do not drive an electric car; I am not handicapped nor am I a cheater who pretends to be; and I am not an expectant mother or a mother with children either. So I park far, far, away - up on the highest level of the parking structure, the level that is exposed to the hot, direct sunlight. My dashboard gets cracked and faded and I have to walk a little further to get to the shopping mall. Life isn't fair for those of us who are among the unentitled.

But I would rather be unentitled then a pregnant woman with children driving an electric car any day.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.


JWR contributor Greg Crosby, former creative head for Walt Disney publications, has written thousands of comics, hundreds of children's books, dozens of essays, and a letter to his congressman. A freelance writer in Southern California, you may contact him by clicking here.

Greg Crosby Archives

© 2008, Greg Crosby

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