• Oklahoma quarterback Baker Mayfield won the Heisman Trophy Saturday. He caught grief at first for grabbing his crotch three times in an angry gesture toward the Kansas bench last month. However now, he could win a special Oscar in Hollywood for being able to keep his hands to himself.
• Los Angeles firefighters continued battling brushfires fueled by desert heat and the Santa Ana winds. After a week, the high temperatures have caused the return of summer bugs and insects. I put a bug zapper on my balcony Thursday and all weekend the flies were dropping like congressmen.
• MSNBC Morning Joe pundits agreed with each other Tuesday that President Trump showed signs of dementia when he slurred in a recent speech. It just never ends. Donald Trump said he does not have dementia, but will increase funding for those with dementia when he becomes president.
• President Trump's decision to recognize Jerusalem as the capital of Israel Wednesday sparked angry protests in the Middle East as well as hearty applause from Israelis. The reaction from Muslim groups was swift and angry. The Palestinians just recognized Austin as the capital of Mexico.
• Vladimir Putin announced at an event in the Kremlin Wednesday that he's decided to run for re-election as president of Russia. Let's play turnabout is fair play. On Election Day, we hack into their voting machines and elect Bernie Sanders, and suddenly Russia is right back at square one.
• The UN Commission on Human Rights last week blasted the practice of human trafficking in the Third World as evil beyond description. They reported that in the Sudan you can buy a slave for the price of an iPod. That may be true, but try getting one to remember four thousand songs for you.
• The BBC aired a study showing a steep rise homelessness in the U.S. this year. It's increasing at an alarming rate. We've all watched Harvey Weinstein, Kevin Spacey, Louie CK, Al Franken, John Conyers, Matt Lauer and Charlie Rose getting thrown out of their homes since October alone.
• Los Angeles firefighters battled brush fires all over the city and in the San Fernando Valley Wednesday. The nation's weather has been on a rampage for a year. Maybe it's time for Mother Nature to stop with all the brush fires, flooding and hurricanes and accept the fact that Hillary lost.
• The White House worked with House and Senate leaders Thursday to try to pass a spending bill and avert a shutdown tonight. It's perilous. During the last government shutdown four years ago, families in Washington DC were torn apart, mostly by animals escaping from the National Zoo.
• President Obama drew praise from Jewish leaders Wednesday when he announced the U.S. will recognize Jerusalem as Israel's capital. Even Jewish Democrats were always uncomfortable with the previous administration's stand on the issue. President Obama wanted to make Damascus the capital.
• U.S. Embassy employees in Cuba were found to be brain-damaged by sonic attacks which Cuba denies. It makes no sense for Cuba's regime to attack Americans when the island's economy is in tatters. Things are so bad in Cuba that if you throw a dog a bone the dog has to signal for a fair catch.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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