Jewish World Review Dec. 14, 2011 / 18 Kislev, 5772
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | President Obama vowed to delay his vacation until Congress agrees to raise taxes on the rich to extend payroll tax cuts. Democrats insist they don't mind success as long as it's shared. They want Tim Tebow to give away two games a year in the name of equality.
Tim Tebow led the Denver Broncos to their sixth straight come-from-behind victory Sunday over the Chicago Bears. He's now the number-one topic at the water cooler in the country. Tim Tebow is the most talked-about white Bronco since the O.J. Simpson chase.
Lowe's home improvement store ended its sponsorship of All-American Muslim on TLC Monday after groups complained it was pro-Muslim propaganda. Their ad agency thought it was a perfect fit. Lowe's sells building materials and Muslims create a demand for them.
Hollywood traffic was snarled Saturday when a shooter stood in an intersection and fired at passing cars until cops arrived and shot him dead. It was all televised. Los Angeles citizens are demanding an ordinance which stops these reality shows from snarling traffic.
Panama welcomed Manuel Noriega after the deposed dictator spent twenty years in a U.S. prison for cocaine trafficking and money laundering. He's back in business. Noriega signed a pledge promising to be faithful to his wife and he ready to hold public office again.
President Obama asked Iran Monday to give back the U.S. drone aircraft that crashed in the eastern mountains of Iran last week while the CIA was spying on Iran's nuclear facility. Tehran said no. They've already wrapped it up and they plan to re-gift it to China.
Mitt Romney challenged Rick Perry to a ten thousand dollar bet in Saturday's debate in Iowa over a point. The media speculated that Iowans could never imagine a bet that high. In fact, Iowans bet their subsidized corn crop--which can be made into food, sugar or gasoline--against the weather every year and they leave ten grand in the tip jar for the congressmen.
Norway reported a severe butter shortage Monday due to low dairy output and high fat diets. Butter is selling for five hundred dollars a pound. Americans who normally celebrate Christmas with Norwegian butter cookies will be buying cars for each other instead.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Argus Hamilton