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April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review

Success stories of parents setting boundaries

By John Rosemond




Common sense goes a long way

http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | (MCT) I have long maintained that the happiest kids are also well-behaved and vice versa. That assertion is supported by common sense as well as research into parenting outcomes which shows that children raised by loving parents who are no-nonsense when it comes to discipline score the highest on measures of adjustment. Two stories, submitted by readers, underscore the point:

A mom in Minnesota writes that "As a result of reading what you've written on the need for a boundary between mother and child, I have a new rule for my 29-month-old: After he is done with his lunch, he must stay out of the kitchen. This allows me to eat lunch in peace, since his ventures into the kitchen often end in fussing, misbehaving, and so on. It is a simple (not always easy, but simple), consistent way to establish and enforce a much-needed boundary between us.

"Mind you, I'm not completely unresponsive to his needs and requests, but I'm not catering to his every whim, either. And here's the thing: He seems much, much happier this way. When he's bugging me in the kitchen, neither of us is happy. When he's playing by himself (and I do mean playing, not watching TV or pushing buttons) in the next room, he is engaged and content.

"This practice extends to other situations as well, like when he doesn't want to eat what I've provided for a meal. If he wants to eat, he may come into the kitchen, take his place at the table, and eat. Otherwise, he may not be in the kitchen at all (which prevents him from whining, making a mess with his food, and so on)."

I share this story in the hopes that Minnesota Mom will serve as an inspiration to a generation of moms who've been intimidated by psychobabble into feeling they don't have a right to establish boundaries between themselves and their kids. As this story shows, such boundaries are good for both mother and child.






Another mom, whereabouts unknown, shared a success story based on my brilliant, internationally-celebrated "Ticket" method which she and her husband implemented after their 4-year-old son began talking back to them and acting disrespectfully toward Grandma. She writes, "We implemented the Three Ticket (per diem) System upon which he lost a ticket for any back talk, dirty looks, or sassiness to ourselves or any adult. The first two tickets of the day were "free," but if and when he lost his third ticket he had to spend the rest of that day in his room.

"On day two, he lost all of his tickets by lunchtime and off to his room he went. The somewhat amazing thing is that he hasn't lost all three tickets since."

That's a great report, but the best part is yet to come. Anonymous Mom then writes, "But what we notice most is that he is a much happier and much more secure little boy. I believe now he knew what he was doing and was waiting for us to step in and take control. His newfound security translates into happiness, obviously. His good behavior is very freeing for us as well. We no longer threaten, huff and puff, or give him hurt-feeling looks. Now every morning he goes to make sure he has three tickets in the magnetic clip on the fridge and re-checks his ticket status throughout the day. All this progress in only a week!"

Another misbehavior demon bites the dust!

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John Rosemond is a psychologist, family therapist and nationally known expert on parenting issues


Previously:


Parenting 101 in session (Conclusion)
Parenting 101 in session, Part I
'Gifted' children, who aren't
Get away from 'psychological thinking'
What do today's children seriously lack that children in the 1950s and before enjoyed in abundance?
'Fixing' Son's Shyness
Mothers who fall short --- by design
To tell a child 'You can be anything you want to be' is irresponsible
Family 'democracy' can turn to tyranny
'Because I said so' signals strong parental leadership
It's time for parents to get their heads out of the '60s





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