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Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review Dec. 11, 2006 / 20 Kislev, 5767

Lonely senior getting conned

By Jan L. Warner & Jan Collins


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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Q: My father was very lonely after Mother died two years ago. Despite the fact that he never went out at night or drank to excess, at age 78 he began making the rounds. Much to our dismay, he not only brought a woman whom he had rounded up to our family Thanksgiving dinner, but he also announced that he was going to marry "the love of his life." My sister and I almost fainted. This woman is only 52 — my age — and, not to be catty, but she wears lots of makeup and lipstick, has oodles of dyed blond hair and wears miniskirts and boots that don't hide much of her abundant figure.


It turns out that Dad met her at a local beer joint where she was waiting tables. She gave him a story about being down on her luck, so he is now supporting her, and they intend to marry on Christmas Day. My sister and I hired a private detective to do a background check on her and learned that one of her sons is serving time for armed robbery and the other has HIV; she has been married four times — two husbands died and she is divorced from the other two; she has tax liens and judgments against her; and she was convicted of domestic violence against her last husband and served 30 days in the hoosegow.


We have been trying to figure out a way to tell Dad he is making a mistake, but we don't think anything we say will dissuade him. When I stopped by his house the other day to visit, I saw two credit card bills on the table totaling more than $4,000. This was shocking because he and my mother never had a credit card or debt.


We believe he will be broke in a year or less, both physically and financially. But he still drives, takes care of his checking account and is logical about everything — except her. We even met with the adult protective investigators, but they tell us their hands are tied. Dad is breaking every rule he ever taught us to follow. We have run out of ideas and don't want to lose our father. Please help.


A: While we're sure one of the rules he taught you growing up was "the best predictor of the future is the past," it appears that his infatuation has overshadowed his common sense.


Before we get to possible solutions, be advised that if your father marries as planned without completing appropriate planning documents, which we are confident he has not and will not, it will be his new bride — not you and your sister — who will have priority to make his health care decisions should he become incapacitated.


Likewise, should proceedings be commenced regarding control of his funds and assets if he becomes incapacitated, his new bride will have priority to be appointed as his fiduciary. This means that in order to assume control, you and/or your sister will be required to go to court and convince a judge that the wife is not the proper person to be in charge, which will be expensive and time-consuming.


The first order of business is to try to convince Dad to see a qualified attorney who will be able to prepare appropriate, durable powers of attorney for health care and finances, not to mention a will, that will protect him "just in case." If things work out, he can always change his documents later.

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In addition, Dad should be advised of the rules governing placement of his new spouse on his bank accounts and filing joint income-tax returns, especially where, as here, his wife has judgments and tax liens that could lead to garnishment of his money.


Now, for the really hard part: Who should break the news? His physician? A friend? Because this is a real problem not only for your Dad but also for many other lonely seniors, we invite our readers to e-mail their suggestions to us via the link below.

Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.

JAN L. WARNER received his A.B. and J.D. degrees from the University of South Carolina and earned a Master of Legal Letters (L.L.M.) in Taxation from the Emory University School of Law in Atlanta, Georgia. He is a frequent lecturer at legal education and public information programs throughout the United States. His articles have been published in national and state legal publications. Jan Collins began co-authoring Flying SoloŽ in 1989. She has more than 27 years of experience as a journalist, writer, and editor. To comment or ask a question, please click here.

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