Jewish World Review Dec. 28, 2005 / 27 Kislev, 5766
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
ABC's Monday Night Football broadcast its last game Monday
after thirty-five years. Things have changed in the booth. The
flashing red light used to mean the announcers were on the air,
while today it means Michael Irvin's been arrested again.
The Las Vegas Tourism Bureau forecast its busiest New Year's
week in history Monday. It's also a huge week for the nightclub
business in Los Angeles and New York. Democrats believe there's no
place like home, after all the other places close.
The Clinton Library said Monday it will sell DVDs of Bill
Clinton's stand-up comedy performances at his White House
Correspondents Dinners. He comes off as a comedy genius. Only
Milton Berle had more success dropping his pants for laughs.
The U.S. Senate passed the annual federal budget bill
Tuesday. It set a record for number of projects and dollars spent.
So many trees were cut down to print the bill that our former
presidents can finally see the green on their second shots.
Arnold Schwarzenegger's name was removed from a soccer stadium in his home town in Austria because Austrians are angry at him for supporting the death penalty. Who do they think they're fooling? Maybe the Austrians can be themselves again when Springtime for Hitler wins Best Song at the upcoming Academy Awards.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
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© 2005, Argus Hamilton