Jewish World Review Dec. 9, 2005 / 8 Kislev, 5766
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
The Weather Channel said an Arctic front made it into Texas
Thursday, sending temperatures below zero. The whole country is in
the deep freeze. Domino's is promising that if your pizza doesn't
arrive in thirty minutes they'll shoot the dogs.
New Orleans refugees blasted the government response to
Hurricane Katrina in Congress Tuesday and demanded their city
back. You wouldn't recognize the place any more. Every night the
Mormon Tabernacle Choir sings at a joint on Bourbon Street.
Saddam Hussein's trial was postponed Tuesday when he refused
to show up. They couldn't continue the televised trial without a
star. O.J. Simpson refused to fill in because he doesn't want to
give all the money to Fred Goldman when he's acquitted.
The Chicago City Council voted overwhelmingly on Wednesday
to ban smoking in public places. The ban begins in six weeks, but
taverns and bars have almost three years to comply with the law.
Their attitude in Chicago is, cancer takes time.
Fidel Castro hosted a rally in Havana Tuesday honoring Elian Gonzalez on his twelfth birthday, and the dictator praised the boy's prowess as a karate student. Cuba can't take credit for him. He learned to kick down doors when he lived in Miami.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
Comment by clicking here.
© 2005, Argus Hamilton