Jewish World Review Nov 22, 2011 / 25 Mar-Cheshvan 5772
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Idaho resident Oscar Ortega was charged Friday with firing a rifle at the White House and cracking a window in the residence. He must be deranged. The White House has a federal contractor who replaces windows, they don't just hire some guy from the park.
The Pentagon held a successful test flight of a flying super-bomb Thursday that can land anywhere in the world within one hour. Herman Cain said that's really not good enough. If it doesn't get there within thirty minutes, then the second bomb should be free.
Newt Gingrich went sailing past Mitt Romney for first place in the GOP polls in both Iowa and New Hampshire last Friday. It won't go unanswered. Mitt Romney huddled with his campaign advisors all night on Saturday and they decided to let his hair grow out.
Congress introduced a bill Thursday which classifies pizza as a vegetable for school lunch menus in the national school lunch program. They have to find a way to keep pizza legal in school. When they serve the kids broccoli and whole grains, it just causes a landfill crisis.
The White House imposed a six-month delay on oil shale drilling in Ohio Friday just days after the president postponed the Keystone oil pipeline from Canada to Texas. Some things are more important than any jobs that might be created. The president read an environmental impact report showing that oil workers are as Republican as oil executives.
Occupy Wall Street camps across the country were busted by police, resulting in hundreds of protesters being arrested. The camps were ridden with lice, fleas, tuberculosis, dysentery, and venereal diseases. We toppled Saddam Hussein for less.
President Obama flew to Bali to attend a meeting of Pacific nation leaders Friday. He announced the sale of Boeing planes and GE engines to Indonesia and Singapore. They wanted to reward the president for making Hawaii a part of Asia in his speech last Sunday.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2011, Argus Hamilton