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Jewish World Review Nov. 19, 2008 / 21 Mar-Cheshvan 5769 Don't get all bento out of shape By Celia Rivenbark http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Why are so many women determined to make more work for themselves? Remember last year's dreadful "ghosting" and "elving" craze? Women across this great land baked homemade treats, wrote clever little poems and delivered them, in secret, to their neighbors like some sort of psychotic chain letter with marshmallows. Men, meanwhile, drafted players for their fantasy football teams and took a nap. Ghosting and elving was bad, but the bento box craze showing up at school is even worse. Bento boxes are Japanese lunch boxes with little compartments for different foods. Fancy foods. Foods that bring out the Mommie wars like nothing I've ever seen. Foods like faux sushi constructed from strawberry cream cheese, bananas and white bread that looks just like the real fancypants sushi you'd get from the nice place at the mall. One Texas mom I read about cut up a boiled egg to look just like a daffodil; another carved a realistic bunny rabbit entirely out of white cheddar for her daughter's bento box. And you thought Texas cheerleading was competitive. In Japan, the bento lunchbox is highly competitive because mothers believe a successful bento box represents the "uprightness of the household, a true measure of a mother's love." Great. I finally got the hang of making pancakes shaped like Mickey and now I gotta make rice balls that look just like Hello Kitty for my kid's lunchbox. Wonder if it's OK to substitute Sour Patch Kids candy for miniature fruit kebobs? Probably not. My daughter's lunchbox is just an insulated sack from Target so it would be hard to, as one parenting Web site (www.toomuchtimeour hands.com) recommended, display macaroni and cheese shaped like a VW bug, complete with fruit roll-up windows. Guess we'll just have to stick to ham on wheat or peanut butter and banana, all with crusts intact. If the Target bag gets smelly, I put it in a paper bag. I am SO not upright. Bento boxes aren't perfect, anyway. Those tiny compartments can't hold more than two full-size Doritos at best. In Japan, the bento box is supposed to remind the child that his mother cherishes him and that his home is a haven. Even as he is biting into a train caboose made of whittled sea urchin, his mother is literally counting the minutes until his return home. Nah, that won't give him a complex. Far be it from me to criticize another culture's centuries-old belief system. Just kidding! Of course that's what I'm doing, but it's for the right reasons: We got enough crap to do without fretting about our kid having Most Honorable Lunchbox. I shouldn't worry. I live in the South and it's almost impossible to make a decent Dora the Explorer out of potted meat. Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here. Celia Rivenbark is an award-winning news reporter and freelance columnist for The Sun News in Myrtle Beach, S.C. Comment by clicking here. For you, Princess? I'll buy junk Gwyneth P. needs big ol' reality check Reality show amuses yet repels viewer Spying on kid at summer camp awfully fulfilling Stars? Great outdoors? I don't think so Honesty in the name of fashion Perfect attendance award is for little, viral losers Trendy new ailment not for everybody What is wrong with the women today who marry insanely rich and talented men and then think they still have to cook? Shagadelic on the dance floor Ex-boyfriends can have the worst timing Little wonder many voters are confused Sound bites not easy in Southern I swear it's not my fault Celebrity news gets weirder, trumps all else Driver's license? Outta my way while I get `em Like taking Miley Cyrus tickets from a baby Driving under the influence of celebrity Hugged your Webkinz today? Hate mail spawned by humor columns ‘High School Musical’ rocks to the max! Where did latest ‘syndrome’ come from? Tell the truth, folks, we all love Paris' trauma and drama Tell the truth, folks, we all love Paris' trauma and drama Office gossip is protected free speech First-class corpse Song lyrics have only gotten dumber Talk to the clock because the ISP doesn't care Being a happy human vessel has its limits Who's not your daddy? Phoning for dazzlers Proper spelling begins at home Sick of the waiting room Road signs Halt your motion toward the lotion Sudoku's got my husband's number One short stack of smarts, please Spa me the kids IRS wants us to like it so much that it smacks of desperation Uniforms: Soul-sucking sameness Girls' pajama parties a little different now Welcome back for guilt-free manly man A big boo-hoo for disgraced celebs Girls' pajama parties a little different now When Bubbas and hoes are extra welcome Ageless icons can't escape their ages Gifts to kids' teachers make competitive moms antsy Kid bumper stickers sure not ‘terrific’ © 2007, The Sun News Distributed by Knight Ridder/Tribune Information Services

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