Jewish World Review Nov. 30, 2007 / 20 Kislev 5768
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
The American Journal of Clinical Nutrition published research Tuesday showing that women who drink moderate amounts of wine have healthier blood vessels. Wine is a wonderful thing for women. It raises their good cholesterol and lowers their standards.
GOP presidential candidates held a debate in Florida Wednesday. The candidates spent the first half-hour bashing illegal immigration and vowing to build longer and higher border walls. There must be an easier way to recruit steeplechase champions.
Rudy Giuliani was reported Wednesday to have billed New York City for security expenses as mayor when he visited the Hamptons to commit adultery with Judi Nathan. You cannot expect the mayor to travel without security. What if his wife follows him?
Bill Clinton spoke about himself in Iowa for two hours on Tuesday when he was supposed to be talking about Hillary. This is a tough year for him. Everywhere Bill Clinton goes, he puts seven chairs next to him so he'll feel like he's in the debates.
Venezuela broke diplomatic ties with Colombia Tuesday over a tiff between their leaders. Venezuela is a huge oil producer and Colombia exports cocaine. These two countries have more American dollars than the Federal Reserve and China put together.
Senator Teddy Kennedy signed the richest political book deal in history Monday to write his memoirs. He's been keeping detailed notes throughout his career. His co-author now faces the daunting task of collating a hundred thousand cocktail napkins.
Richard Nixon's tapes revealed Tuesday he almost appointed FBI agent Mark Felt to head the FBI. He's the guy who leaked Watergate secrets as Deep Throat. Mark Felt had a lot of nerve claiming he was Deep Throat when the only thing he ever blew was the whistle.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2007, Argus Hamilton