Jewish World Review Nov. 22, 2006 / 1 Kislev, 5767
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes got married in a non-religious ceremony in Italy Sunday. She's Roman Catholic and his religion believes mankind was deposited on earth by space aliens. Their children could grow up believing anything O.J. has to say.
Fox canceled this week's scheduled interview with O.J. Simpson where he would have plugged his book, If I Did It, and told how he would have committed the murders. It could have become a series. Think of the ratings for Michael Jackson's interview, If I Did Him.
Thanksgiving Day arrives Thursday with a brand new cooking warning issued by the Food and Drug Administration. They just approved silicone gel breast implants. If your turkey is from California, squeeze it and make sure they're real before you roast it.
The U.S. Mint rolled out the new George Washington one-dollar gold coin Monday in a series that will eventually honor every president. It's good that they're going in order. They still can't decide whether to make the Bill Clinton coin all head or all tails.
Henry Kissinger told London newspapers the U.S. must exit Iraq because the war is unwinnable. You remember him. He's the Secretary of State who used his charm and intellect to establish permanent peace in the Middle East thirty-five years ago.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2006, Argus Hamilton