Jewish World Review Nov. 8, 2005 / 6 Mar-Cheshvan, 5766
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
Prince Charles was cheered in California Saturday when he
toured the organic farm town of Point Reyes Station. The farmers
had to laugh. No sooner do they get a legal market in Denver for
their crops before the king drops by to announce the stamp tax.
Denver voters decided last Tuesday to legalize the
possession of marijuana inside the city limits of Denver. Blame it
on Coors. The people of Denver wouldn't need to legalize pot if
someone in that state would brew a beer that had some kick to it.
Woody Allen discusses his life in this month's Vanity Fair.
He says how nice it is to have a wife who waits on him hand and
foot and isn't in show business. There's no doubt he wears the
pants in the family, especially after the court order.
Dwight Gooden got probation Wednesday after pleading guilty
to speeding away from a cop when he was stopped in Tampa. He told
the judge he has changed. Gasoline is so expensive now that Dwight
Gooden has begun remaining at the scene of the crime.
A Carnival Cruise off Somalia was attacked by pirates
wielding machine guns Friday. The industry is shocked. It's the
first known act of piracy on a cruise ship since some hack comic
did Kip Addotta's act in the Caribbean for a dozen years.
Jimmy Carter ripped the White House Friday for claiming a
connection between Saddam Hussein and al-Qaeda before the war. He
called for more scrutiny into the relationship between al-Qaeda
and Saudi Arabia. Only George Hamilton has more ties.
Hillary Clinton was revealed Friday to be paying eight U.S. Senate staffers extra money to work on her re-election campaign. She's right on schedule. She has been trustworthy and honest and ethical for five years now and she was overdue for a relapse.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
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© 2005, Argus Hamilton