Home
In this issue
December 2, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Defending the Right to a Jewish State

Heather Hale: Compliment your kids without giving them big heads

Megan Shauri: 10 ways you are ruining your own happiness

Carolyn Bigda: 8 Best Dividend Stocks for 2015

Kiplinger's Personal Finance editors: 7 Things You Didn't Know About Paying Off Student Loans

Samantha Olson: The Crucial Mistake 55% Of Parents Are Making At Their Baby's Bedtime

Densie Well, Ph.D., R.D. Open your eyes to yellow vegetables

The Kosher Gourmet by Megan Gordon With its colorful cache of purples and oranges and reds, COLLARD GREEN SLAW is a marvelous mood booster --- not to mention just downright delish
April 18, 2014

Rabbi Yonason Goldson: Clarifying one of the greatest philosophical conundrums in theology

Caroline B. Glick: The disappearance of US will

Megan Wallgren: 10 things I've learned from my teenagers

Lizette Borreli: Green Tea Boosts Brain Power, May Help Treat Dementia

John Ericson: Trying hard to be 'positive' but never succeeding? Blame Your Brain

The Kosher Gourmet by Julie Rothman Almondy, flourless torta del re (Italian king's cake), has royal roots, is simple to make, . . . but devour it because it's simply delicious

April 14, 2014

Rabbi Dr Naftali Brawer: Passover frees us from the tyranny of time

Greg Crosby: Passing Over Religion

Eric Schulzke: First degree: How America really recovered from a murder epidemic

Georgia Lee: When love is not enough: Teaching your kids about the realities of adult relationships

Cameron Huddleston: Freebies for Your Lawn and Garden

Gordon Pape: How you can tell if your financial adviser is setting you up for potential ruin

Dana Dovey: Up to 500,000 people die each year from hepatitis C-related liver disease. New Treatment Has Over 90% Success Rate

Justin Caba: Eating Watermelon Can Help Control High Blood Pressure

The Kosher Gourmet by Joshua E. London and Lou Marmon Don't dare pass over these Pesach picks for Manischewitz!

April 11, 2014

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg: Silence is much more than golden

Caroline B. Glick: Forgetting freedom at Passover

Susan Swann: How to value a child for who he is, not just what he does

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Financial Tasks You Should Tackle Right Now

Sandra Block and Lisa Gerstner: How to Profit From Your Passion

Susan Scutti: A Simple Blood Test Might Soon Diagnose Cancer

Chris Weller: Have A Slow Metabolism? Let Science Speed It Up For You

The Kosher Gourmet by Diane Rossen Worthington Whitefish Terrine: A French take on gefilte fish

April 9, 2014

Jonathan Tobin: Why Did Kerry Lie About Israeli Blame?

Samuel G. Freedman: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Jessica Ivins: A resolution 70 years later for a father's unsettling legacy of ashes from Dachau

Kim Giles: Asking for help is not weakness

Kathy Kristof and Barbara Hoch Marcus: 7 Great Growth Israeli Stocks

Matthew Mientka: How Beans, Peas, And Chickpeas Cleanse Bad Cholesterol and Lowers Risk of Heart Disease

Sabrina Bachai: 5 At-Home Treatments For Headaches

The Kosher Gourmet by Daniel Neman Have yourself a matzo ball: The secrets bubby never told you and recipes she could have never imagined

April 8, 2014

Lori Nawyn: At Your Wit's End and Back: Finding Peace

Susan B. Garland and Rachel L. Sheedy: Strategies Married Couples Can Use to Boost Benefits

David Muhlbaum: Smart Tax Deductions Non-Itemizers Can Claim

Jill Weisenberger, M.S., R.D.N., C.D.E : Before You Lose Your Mental Edge

Dana Dovey: Coffee Drinkers Rejoice! Your Cup Of Joe Can Prevent Death From Liver Disease

Chris Weller: Electric 'Thinking Cap' Puts Your Brain Power Into High Gear

The Kosher Gourmet by Marlene Parrish A gift of hazelnuts keeps giving --- for a variety of nutty recipes: Entree, side, soup, dessert

April 4, 2014

Rabbi David Gutterman: The Word for Nothing Means Everything

Charles Krauthammer: Kerry's folly, Chapter 3

Amy Peterson: A life of love: How to build lasting relationships with your children

John Ericson: Older Women: Save Your Heart, Prevent Stroke Don't Drink Diet

John Ericson: Why 50 million Americans will still have spring allergies after taking meds

Cameron Huddleston: Best and Worst Buys of April 2014

Stacy Rapacon: Great Mutual Funds for Young Investors

Sarah Boesveld: Teacher keeps promise to mail thousands of former students letters written by their past selves

The Kosher Gourmet by Sharon Thompson Anyone can make a salad, you say. But can they make a great salad? (SECRETS, TESTED TECHNIQUES + 4 RECIPES, INCLUDING DRESSINGS)

April 2, 2014

Paul Greenberg: Death and joy in the spring

Dan Barry: Should South Carolina Jews be forced to maintain this chimney built by Germans serving the Nazis?

Mayra Bitsko: Save me! An alien took over my child's personality

Frank Clayton: Get happy: 20 scientifically proven happiness activities

Susan Scutti: It's Genetic! Obesity and the 'Carb Breakdown' Gene

Lecia Bushak: Why Hand Sanitizer May Actually Harm Your Health

Stacy Rapacon: Great Funds You Can Own for $500 or Less

Cameron Huddleston: 7 Ways to Save on Home Decor

The Kosher Gourmet by Steve Petusevsky Exploring ingredients as edible-stuffed containers (TWO RECIPES + TIPS & TECHINQUES)

Jewish World Review Oct. 5, 2012/ 19 Tishrei, 5773

It's up to parents to pull plug on Internet

By Marybeth Hicks





http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | A week ago, after I gave a speech to a parent group, a mother with a difficult issue approached me. It was something she didn't want to discuss in front of her school community during the question-and-answer session.

"Basically," she whispered, "my daughter is totally addicted to Facebook. She is on it all the time -- and I mean ALL the time -- and if we ask her to click off and join the family, she gets very nasty.

"I feel like I should do something," the mother told me, choking back her emotion, "but I don't know what to do."

This is not the first time a parent has confided in me about struggling with a child's behavior. When it comes to parenting dilemmas, I'm like the proverbial airplane seatmate. People tend to spill their guts to me because they know they will never see me again. So I figure the good Lord has put me in these situations to speak the truth.

What's true is that "Internet-use disorder" is going into the international listing of mental diagnoses -- the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders -- as a condition "recommended for further study," when the next manual is published in May.

According to news reports, specialists from Australia, along with the Australian Psychological Society, submitted the diagnosis, along with a separate listing for Internet gaming addiction. Medically speaking, an addiction is anything that so consumes a person that stopping it causes withdrawal symptoms.

Certainly, what the mother at last week's parent conference described to me was withdrawal. She said efforts to curb her daughter's Web time resulted in anger, irritability, aggressive behavior and depression on the part of her middle-schooler.

Sounds like an ugly month I spent in the '80s going cold turkey on Virginia Slims.

But who is responsible for this new addiction afflicting young people? Steve Jobs? Mark Zuckerberg? The Super Mario Bros.?

I blame Al Gore.

OK, no. But someone has to take responsibility for allowing children to be so engaged with a particular type of activity that such engagement becomes a health risk.

Someone has to notice that a child as young as 10 or 12, who formerly was a typical, active youngster, no longer goes outside to play or asks to bake brownies or gets into fights with his siblings, but instead retreats to a bedroom or the basement recreation room, puts on a pair of headphones and proceeds to spend upward of six hours after school on Facebook or playing "Tour of Duty."

Someone ought to be able to see the change in demeanor early in this addictive behavior, when merely calling the child to the dinner table elicits a negative, argumentative response.

Someone certainly is capable of observing the signs that a child is more interested in being alone with a machine than being involved with family members or the children in the neighborhood or the cat.

I think we all know who that someone is.

To allow technology to be so central to the lives of our children that they become deranged by the thought of turning it off strikes me as a profound act of neglect on the part of the people responsible for their care.

Not that I said any of this to that mother who asked what to do.

To her, I said, "Call a family meeting and say, 'Dad and I have decided we can do a better job of keeping the Internet from becoming an unhealthy part of our lives. So we are creating new family standards about how we use technology and media.'"

Then, I suggested, write down the rules about how much time your children can spend online, when they may use the Internet and where in the house they are permitted to be. When the time is up, unplug the router and call it a night.

As for the withdrawal symptoms? They'll subside. The question is, can parents give up being too permissive? That's a much harder habit to kick.

Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.


BUY MARYBETH'S LATEST BOOK AT A 37% DISCOUNT

Click HERE to purchase it (Sales help fund JWR.).

JWR contributor Marybeth Hicks, a wife of more than 20 years and mother of four children, lives in the Midwest. She uses her column to share her perspective on issues and experiences that shape families nationwide. To comment, please click here.


Archives




© 2009, Marybeth Hicks