Jewish World Review Oct 17, 2011 / 19 Tishrei, 5772
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | Herman Cain spent Tuesday's debate defending his flat tax from attack by his fellow Republicans. He's an economic conservative. Liberal Democrats found themselves in the odd position of cheering for the six white people beating a black man in broad daylight.
The NBA canceled the season's first two weeks Tuesday, leaving players with little to do. The good news is that Las Vegas is full of high rollers now. The bad news is, they all want to play on credit and they are scaring away the other customers with all their tattoos.
Wall Street protesters remained camped out near the stock exchange Tuesday. They organize marches using Apple iPhones, Facebook, and Google. They want the world to know how hard life is if they have to use every labor-saving device in the world to prove it.
The National Hot Dog Council criticized the golf fan Thursday who threw a hot dog at Tiger Woods on the green Sunday. The guy's life is ruined. It didn't take Michelle Obama three years in the White House to get Americans to inform on each other to the food police.
Florida's Highway Department said Thursday the recession has resulted in reduced highway deaths because fewer people are taking trips which means fewer cars on the road. It's too soon to say the recession has saved lives, however. Until we get the statistics showing how many people have died of starvation and exposure we won't get the full story.
Attorney General Eric Holder was subpoenaed by Congress Thursday to testify about his knowledge of Operation Fast and Furious. ATF undercover agents sold two thousand powerful assault rifles to the Mexican cartel. Last month on Mexican Independence Day they fired their rifles into the air to celebrate and they brought down two U.S. satellites.
The FAA suspended a California skydiving pilot's license Friday after a couple leaped out and had sex in mid-air before deploying the chute. It ruined everyone's fun. Barbara Bush just told George that if he's going skydiving on his next birthday, she's going with him.
President Obama vowed Thursday to isolate Iran after a terror plot was uncovered. We're asked to believe an Iranian used car salesman recruited what he thought was a Mexican cartel member to attack Washington D.C. for a measly million bucks. There is now solid evidence that somebody in the Justice Department is writing spec scripts for USA Network.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2009, Argus Hamilton