Jewish World Review Oct. 20, 2010 / 12 Mar-Cheshvan, 5771
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
NFL star Junior Seau drove his Escalade over a cliff in San Diego Monday. He's unhurt. After being tested by the steepest cliffs in California and the angriest wife in golf, the Escalade is poised to replace the Volvo as the safest car in the world.
Brett Favre was grilled by NFL investigators Tuesday over those lewd photos of himself sent to a N.Y. Jets cheerleader. It's all innocent. The photos that Brett sent to the cheerleader were intended for his wife but, Brett being Brett, they were intercepted.
Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards wrote an autobiography called Stone Me which details the group's crazy lifestyle in the Sixties and Seventies. He makes no apologies but we all mean well. Keith Richards said no to drugs, but they wouldn't listen.
GOP Senate candidate Rand Paul was cited by Democrats for a college prank in which he tied up a girl and told her to worship an icon he named Aqua Buddha. Reaction was furious. President Obama just issued a death sentence for anyone who draws a cartoon of Aqua Buddha.
Chile's president Sebastian Pinera declared a national holiday Monday honoring the miners who were trapped for sixty-nine days. The moment they surfaced each man had just two questions: How are the kids and who do I talk to about overtime?
President Obama will drop into Los Angeles to campaign for Democrats Friday. It will shut down traffic between the airport and downtown all day. He doesn't realize that O.J. Simpson had the independents on his side in L.A. until his police motorcade tied up traffic.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2009, Argus Hamilton