Jewish World Review Oct. 5, 2010 / 27 Tishrei, 5771
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
President Obama told voters Thursday his recovery plan will begin yielding new jobs soon. That's a little misleading. Just because the jobs of Speaker of the House and Senate Majority Leader are about to open up doesn't mean that anyone can apply for them.
CNN fired host Rick Sanchez Friday for saying that Jon Stewart is a Jewish bigot who hates Hispanics like him and that Jews control the media. He said this Friday. What better way to kick off Hispanic Heritage Month in America than a re-enactment of the Inquisition.
White House former chief of staff Rahm Emanuel arrived in Illinois Monday to start his campaign for mayor of Chicago by meeting the voters. He began his first day of campaigning with a respectful walk through a local cemetery. He's on a listening tour.
Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger reduced the penalty for pot possession to a one hundred dollar fine in California Monday. It's no different than a traffic ticket. However, if you smoke pot in a restaurant or a bar it's still the death penalty.
Walter Mondale published a book Monday urging liberals to fight harder against conservatives. He's particularly incensed against the Religious Right. Walter Mondale said there is no place for G0d in politics, and apparently G0d felt the same way about Walter Mondale.
President Obama vowed to train ten thousand new math and science teachers Friday. The potential is there. Thousands of kids in Los Angeles know the metric system and can use a triple-beam scale but none of them want to take a thousand percent pay cut to teach it in school.
Journal Science said that people who work with their laptops on their laps risk getting Toasted Skin Syndrome. It's been known for awhile. When the White House slapped a tax on tanning salons in July, George Hamilton began typing with his laptop on his face.
Bank of America announced Friday it's going to stop evicting people from their homes and stop foreclosing on houses in twenty-three states. The bank's board of directors made the decision for humanitarian reasons. The paperwork was killing their loan officers.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2009, Argus Hamilton