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Jewish World Review
Oct. 14, 2009
/ 26 Tishrei 5770
And now for the important news ....
By
Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
The Los Angeles Dodgers swept the St. Louis Cardinals in three games to win the National League Divisional Series in St. Louis Saturday. The TV ratings were huge. President Obama watched all three games and was named the series Most Valuable Player.
Paranormal Activity sold out at theaters Saturday by showing video proof of ghost activity. It spotlights the world's unexplained phenomena. The movie got a boost Friday when President Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize the same day he bombed the moon.
President Obama conceded Friday he was surprised to learn he had won the Nobel Peace Prize and had done nothing to earn it. That's how nervous the world is about the U.S. They will hand us a peace prize just for doing nothing for nine months, the same way Northern Europe used to thank G-d whenever the Vikings would stay home all summer.
President Obama held a closed-door meeting on Thursday with Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. He also had a closed-door meeting with House Speaker Nancy Pelosi. After what's happened to David Letterman, it's pretty reckless to leave the door open.
U.S. citizen Luis Pena Soltren flew home to New York Friday forty years after he hijacked a plane to Cuba. He's safe now. Because of all the long lines at airports, baggage fees, body searches and three-dollar cokes, Americans now side with hijackers.
White House communications director Anita Dunn described Fox News as a wing of the Republican Party Sunday. She said that the Obama administration will treat Fox News just like any other opponent. They will apologize to them and sell them weapons.
The Treasury Department said Monday the Taliban's in excellent financial shape this year while al-Qaeda is deeply strapped for cash. It's easy to see why. The Taliban stayed in the heroin trade while al-Qaeda decided to market top-shelf liquor.
Hillary Clinton met in London with Prime Minister Gordon Brown to reaffirm the special relationship between the U.S. and Britain Sunday. The same day President Obama went to St. John's Episcopal, church of presidents for two centuries. The old slogan was Change You Can Believe In, and the new slogan is Change Back before It's Too Late.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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