Jewish World Review Oct. 5, 2006 / 13 Tishrei, 5767
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
Congressman Mark Foley went into rehab Saturday after his underage page scandal broke. That's what Mel Gibson did after his Nazi rant. For the record, alcohol doesn't cause pedophilia or anti-Semitism, it only arranges the billboard advertising.
Mark Foley's lawyer called a press conference Tuesday and explained that the congressman was molested by his priest as a teenager. This is despicable. Bill Clinton never blamed his womanizing on shaking hands with Jack Kennedy as a teenager.
House Democratic leader Nancy Pelosi of San Francisco asked the House Ethics Committee to investigate GOP leaders for covering up Mark Foley's e-mails. She spoke very carefully. The North American Man/Boy Love Association is headquartered in her district.
Congressman Tom Reynolds admitted Tuesday he knew about Mark Foley's e-mails but thought the problem had been handled. He addressed reporters while surrounded by children. Whenever you tell a fairy tale it's good to have an appreciative audience.
The U.S. Border Patrol halted a bus full of singing clowns entering the United States from Mexico Tuesday and found five hundred pounds of cocaine hidden in the bus. It was wrapped in bricks. They heard we want the wall built as fast as possible.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2006, Argus Hamilton