North Korea fired yet another missile into the Pacific Ocean that flew directly over the Japanese island of Hokkaido. Warning sirens went off at six in the morning warning everybody to take cover. Who needs an alarm clock in Japan when North Korea gives you a wake-up call every day.
• Mexican Independence Day was celebrated on both sides of the border. It's a rich country. In addition to the silver and gold they mine, the oil they drill, the corn they grow, the tequila they distill and all the beer they brew, Mexico's also the world's number-one producer of Californians.
• Black Lives Matter protestors covered Thomas Jefferson's statue at the University of Virginia in a black veil, calling him a symbol of historical white privilege. They also assert Jesus was dark-skinned. They claim if Jesus had been white, the Romans would have let him off with a warning ticket.
• St. Louis saw riots break out over the acquittal of a white cop who'd killed a black drug dealer after a high-speed chase. Thousands of rioters burned U.S. flags, overturned cars, looted stores and attacked the police. It looked like six Los Angeles high schools getting out at the same time.
• President Trump will stress economic progress in his UN speech today. Last week he watched approvingly as an eleven-year-old boy mowed the White House lawn for free. It was a signal to China that we're willing to compete at their level if that's what it takes to achieve fair trade with them.
• The Weather Channel enjoyed huge TV ratings due to the catastrophes which hit Florida and Texas, and Saturday they finally had good news. Hurricane Jose won't make landfall on the East Coast this week. Instead, Jose is heading around the horn to California now that it's a sanctuary state.
• Hillary Clinton showed viewers her relaxation exercise in which she pinches one nostril shut and take a deep breath through the other nostril, then she closes the other nostril and inhales deeply. She needs to do this very carefully. Charlie Sheen destroyed his sinuses doing the same thing.
• London was hit by its fifth terrorist attack of the year when an improvised explosive detonated in a subway. ISIS took credit for the bomb. If the number of terrorist attacks by the Islamic State continues at the current rate, candlelight vigils will soon be the number-one cause of global warming.
• The TSA said they will begin giving passengers enhanced pat-downs. They're desperate. It has been sixteen years, a million flights and a billion passengers and they still can't find a black person, a Hispanic person, an Asian person or a white person who is willing to blow up their own airline flight.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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