• President Trump announced he was praying for the people of Florida as Hurricane Irma was approaching Thursday. To most people it's an Act of G0D. Democrat after Democrat promised that if Hurricane Irma strikes Florida and only destroys Mar-a-Lago, they will turn in their atheist card.
• Hillary Clinton's new book What Happened arrives lists all the reasons she lost last fall's election. It's certainly not her fault. She blames Jim Comey, the Russians, the DNC, Bernie Sanders, and finally blames her parents for having her in the first place.
• The Department of Transportation decided not to fine United Airlines for its flight attendants beating and dragging an Asian-American passenger off an overbooked flight for which he'd bought a ticket. It was bad. The good news is, United has just been voted America's favorite Chinese take-out.
• The London Daily Mail reports that ISIS is urging their American terrorist group cells to slip into U.S. grocery stores and poison the food. It's a good idea on paper. Hey, if they would read the labels' list of ingredients and see the amount of fat, sugar and salt in everything, they'd know they were too late.
• The House of Representatives unanimously passed a bill Thursday to facilitate the production of self-driving automobiles. It raises one concern. With the advent of these self-driving vehicles, it's just a matter of time before someone writes a country-western song in which your truck leaves you, too.
• The White House vowed Sunday to meet any North Korea aggression with overwhelming force and fury. It might be tougher than we thought. The U.S. has an overwhelming advantage in tactical and nuclear weapons but suspicions are growing that North Korea has developed a weather machine.
• Hillary Clinton in her forthcoming book blames Bernie Sanders for her stunning election loss last year. She's also blamed the FBI's Jim Comey, the DNC for being broke, and the Russians. If Hillary ever gets around to blaming white people for lying to the pollsters, we finally have a winner.
• U.S. and South Korean navies held war games in the Sea of Japan, bombing, strafing, and firing missiles at buoys in the sea. North Korea has fired missiles into the Sea of Japan for three years. Maybe we can avoid war if all three sides come together over our common hatred of the Sea of Japan.
• Astronaut Janet Whitson landed safely in Kazakhstan after she had spent a record six hundred and sixty-five days in orbit aboard the International Space Station. This lady deserves the highest medal we award for daredevil courage. Janet Whitson returned to Earth and she had a choice.
• PGA star Justin Thomas edged his Texas college pal Jordan Spieth to win in Massachusetts and advance to the top of the Fed Ex Cup standings. The game's appeal is limited. Golf combines the two things Anglo Saxons instinctively love to do, hitting things with a club and swearing.
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