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Jewish World Review
Sept. 8, 2008
/ 8 Elul 5768
And now for the important news ....
By
Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
Jesse Jackson was hospitalized Monday, two months after he threatened to cut off Barack Obama's testicles. Doctors diagnosed food poisoning. Vladimir Putin called Barack Obama and asked if he'd like to enroll in Russia's leadership training program.
Sarah Palin was cheered by Wisconsin voters as a fellow hunter Friday. Hunting is wildly popular. The typical home in Alaska has the head of a moose mounted on the wall, while in Los Angeles the typical home has the head of a rude freeway driver.
Barack Obama told Scranton Friday that global warming was dangerously real and will increase mosquito-borne diseases. Some are deadly. West Nile virus causes apathy and inattentiveness, in other words it's virtually undetectable in Los Angeles.
Jesse Jackson was hospitalized Monday, two months after he threatened to cut off Barack Obama's testicles. Doctors diagnosed food poisoning. Vladimir Putin called Barack Obama and asked if he'd like to enroll in Russia's leadership training program.
Barack Obama was tied up by Rudy Giuliani then beaten by Sarah Palin Wednesday, then the next day he was questioned by Bill O'Reilly on Fox News. This is all backwards. As Moses he's supposed to lead his people out of bondage, not back to the bondage parlor.
Sarah Palin's dual Catholic and Protestant baptisms were unearthed Thursday as the media dug into her infancy. Reporters are crawling over Alaska's tundra with magnifying glasses looking for anything. If O.J. Simpson had been investigated this thoroughly his lawyers would be arguing today that lethal injection's too good for him.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements.
Comment by clicking here.
Argus' Archives
© 2007, Argus Hamilton
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