Jewish World Review Sept. 19, 2006 / 26 Elul, 5766
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
The New Orleans Saints granted press passes to the Al-Jazeera network for Monday night's game in the Superdome. They will be shooting along the sideline. Just when you think American intelligence is bad, the Arabs are following the wrong Bush.
Gridiron Gang starring the Rock was released on Friday about a football team at a Los Angeles juvenile detention center. You have to give these kids a lot of credit. They mask the human growth hormone with cocaine so nobody suspects anything.
Laura Bush will address the Clinton Global Initiative Wednesday at the Sheraton New York Hotel. Something good may come of this. President Bush has a lot more empathy for torture victims now that his wife is going to a hotel with Bill Clinton.
Senator Hillary Clinton blasted the Toronto International Film Festival Sunday for handing an award to the docudrama Death of a President. She said nobody should fantasize about killing the president of the United States. If she didn't do it, nobody should.
John Kerry accused President Bush Sunday of lying about Iraq just so he could overthrow Saddam Hussein. The senator is awfully soft on the dictator who's accused of using mustard gas on his own people. You'd think he was married to Teresa French's.
Russia sent a spacecraft to the space station Tuesday carrying a tourist who paid twenty million dollars for the ride. She wants to see the world from two hundred miles up into space. It's a lot less expensive than moving to Los Angeles and blending in.
Pentagon officials denounced Red China Saturday for selling weapons to rogue nations. They said China will sell anything to anybody and it's making the world very dangerous. There's a Wal-Mart in suburban Detroit that could defeat North Korea.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2006, Argus Hamilton