Jewish World Review Sept. 23, 2005 / 19 Elul, 5765
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
Rafael Palmiero was put under investigation Monday for lying
to Congress last March. He swore he never took steroids and then
tested positive for steroids. He was such a convincing liar that
both parties are recruiting him to run for Congress.
Mel Brooks began casting Young Frankenstein on Broadway
Monday. It's the story of a monster brought back to life by a
lightning bolt and a faithful staff. If you think it could never
happen check out the giant antenna on the roof of the Nixon Library.
President Bush proposed huge spending projects Thursday to
improve the lives of disaster victims. Conservatives are livid. He
spends money so fast the National Association of Divorced Husbands
just voted to name George Bush an honorary ex-wife.
The President's Cup began today at the Robert Trent Jones
Golf Club in Washington D.C. Bill Clinton and former President
Bush plan to participate. They have spent so much of their lives
in the deep rough they can tell you which plants are edible.
The U.S. Senate banned the import of Japanese beef Monday. They're angry Japan banned U.S. beef due to Mad Cow disease. However, the run-off from New Orleans into the ocean has made the choice between beef and fish a far more sporting proposition.
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JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in
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© 2005, Argus Hamilton