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February 22, 2012
Warren Richey: How Supreme Court ruling on Texas could reduce affirmative action across US
Philip Moeller: Hard time determining your current and future savings needs --- and even harder still, executing a plan? Here's what to do about it!
Menachem Wecker: In Tough Job Market, Law Grads Use J.D.s for Nonlegal Work
February 21, 2012
Michael Doyle: Supreme Court to hear arguments on whether a lie is protected speech
Neela Banerjee: NSC wants rules on research that could lead to biological weapons
Fred Weir: Fearing West, Putin pledges biggest military buildup since cold war
February 17, 2012
Kristen Chick: After surviving sectarian mob, Egyptian Christians expelled from village
Eryn Brown: Microchip is a new means of medicating
February 16, 2012
SeaWorld of Pain : Watch Wyatt Cenac, a black comic, confront "whale freedom rider" Lisa Lange of PETA and make her squirm ( LENGTH: 5 minutes)
Jason Koebler: Antibiotics Do Nothing to Cure Sinus Infections, Study Says
February 15, 2012
Jeffrey Fleishman: Women were at the vanguard in the protests that ousted Hosni Mubarak. Meet some who refuse to wake up from their dream --- the mullahs and military be damned
Richard Simon: 'The check is in the mail' could soon be a legal excuse
Liz Bowie: Debate on whether cursive writing should still be taught
Jason Koebler: Super Plants: Could Re-Wired Plants Be the New Cancer Killers?
Susan Johnston: Strategies to preempt unwanted calls or other communication from collectors
February 14, 2012
Dennis Prager: Chris Christie on Israel --- and What It Means to Be a Leader
Frank J. Gaffney Jr.: Shariah's police? Interpol's honoring of Saudi warrant could lead to arrest of Americans
The Kosher Gourmet by Matt Armendariz: VEGETABLE CRUMBLE is a simple, satisfying dish of tender eggplant, zucchini, tomatoes and onions crowned with a savory buttery topping and a sprinkle of fresh herbs
February 13, 2012
Binyamin Rose: Back to the Bunker: How a life-risking act by a Christian family during the Holocaust saved a family and built a thriving community a world away
Menachem Wecker: Business Schools Teach Real Estate Despite Troubled Housing Market
February 10, 2012
Lisa M. Krieger: Man with defibrillator demands access to his own heart's information
David G. Savage: Why activists may not be in a hurry to have High Court rule on alternative marriage
February 9, 2012
Laura McMullen: 10 Least Expensive Public Schools for Out-of-State Students
Kimberly Palmer: How to actually enjoy -- relaxing, financially -- your vacation
February 8, 2012
Warren Richey: Why momentous Prop. 8 ruling might not satisfy gay-rights groups
Menachem Wecker: Though Controversial, LL.M.'s Can Lead to Specialized Legal Jobs
The Kosher Gourmet byDana Velden: Going to the bother of making soup? You know it better be good. This CREAM OF TOMATO SOUP certainly is! And it's a cinch to make, too (Includes techinques and serving secrets)
February 7, 2012
Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: Caught off-guard? President's Super Bowl interview with Matt Lauer gives those who need a reason not to vote for him, a darn good one
Suzanne Bohan: Leaping lizards! Tiny reptiles advancing robot design
February 6, 2012
Jonathan Tobin: Iran Threatens Israel With Destruction, But the New York Times Doesn't Hear It
Jeffrey Fleishman: In newly democratic Egypt, tens of democracy activists jailed, to stand trial; their groups are 'threatening the stability of the homeland'
Julie Deardorff : Researchers say antioxidants may not be that effective and could do more harm than good
Mark Clayton: How did Anonymous hackers eavesdrop on FBI and Scotland Yard?
February 3, 2012
Edmund Sanders : Israeli official says Iran is creating missile that could reach East Coast of US
Victoria Kim: Immigrant-smuggling ring used black drivers to avoid racial profiling
February 2, 2012
Jim Carney: Wrong number call may have saved her life
Reza Kahlili : Ex-CIA spy in Iran's Revolutionary Guard: What Obama doesn't grasp about striking deals with Tehran
Tina Susman: For woodchuck rescuer, every day is Groundhog Day
February 1, 2012
Brian Bennett: US officials see increasing threat of domestic attack from Iran
Emily Brandon: How to Take Advantage of New 401(k) Fee Disclosures
January 31, 2012
January 30, 2012
Paul Richter and Ramin Mostaghim: Misreading Teheran's limits -- deadly and economically devastating as they may be -- is a risk administration, Europe seem willing to take
Suzanne Bohan: Warning: Nap-deprived tots missing more than sleep, study finds
Meg Handley: Banks Revamping Rewards Programs to Woo Customers
January 27, 2012
Caroline B. Glick: Obama: Of course I intend to prevent a nuclear holocaust . . . in a few months
Yochonon Donn: In liberal New York City, fervently-Orthodox Jews may soon be getting a district to call their own
Jeannine Stein: An inflated ego and thinking you're 'all that' doesn't just make others sick of you, it can make you ill
Katy Hopkins: New budget rules may affect how much money you get for college
January 26, 2012
Ed Koch: To the New York Times, calling for the murder of Jews by those capable of having their incitement taken seriously isn't news
Jeannine Stein: Mental illness struck one in five U.S. adults in 2010: Report
January 25, 2012
Richard Simon: House passes two bills endorsing the use of religious symbols at military memorials
Fred Weir: Putin: Multiethnic Russia cannot survive as a US-style 'melting pot'; must find its own way
Susan Johnston: 5 Sneaky Coupon Strategies Consumers Should Watch Out For
January 24, 2012
Carol Clark: The price of your soul: How your brain decides whether to 'sell out'
Caroline B. Glick: America lost most in 'Arab Spring'. Sadly, many voters still don't grasp the extent
Warren Richey: Drug criminal scores win in GPS ruling from conservative-leaning high court
Erika Bolstad: Black conservatives gather to talk about gaining strength
January 23, 2012
Melissa Dribben: Jewish voters to play a key role in Florida's Republican primary
Jordan Rau: In quest to grow, Catholic hospital system will announce this morning its break from church
Ali Safi: U.S. envoy gives Taliban terms for peace talks
January 19, 2012
January 18, 2012
January 17, 2012
Frank J. Gaffney Jr.: No-kidding red lines: U.S. response to an Iranian nuke may be bluster, but Israel's won't be
David G. Savage: They sued their principals after slandering them online --- now the cases are headed to the Supreme Court
David Francis: Where to Invest in 2012: With stocks expected to rebound, opportunity abounds for investors
January 13, 2012
Ben Lynfield: Israeli lawmakers move to annex Jewish Judea, one museum at a time
Alexia Elejalde-Ruiz: Thriving through touch: Gentle massage helps older people with low mobility improve in mind and body
January 12, 2012
Warren Richey: Landmark Supreme Court ruling a 'resounding win' for religious groups
Warren Richey: Supreme Court says no to new rule on eyewitness testimony
John Fauber : Statins found to raise diabetes risk in postmenopausal women
Katy Hopkins : Consider This Before You Pay for an Online Degree
The Kosher Gourmet by Joseph Erdos: This mushroom and barley soup has an intense -- almost nutty -- flavor that mixes robust with Middle East. It has creaminess without cream
January 11, 2012
Shari Roan: Millions of atrial fibrillation sufferers at risk for devastating, but preventable, stroke
Tom Hussain: Pakistan -- recipient of more than $21 billion in civilian and military aid -- speeds pursuit of Iranian pipeline, defying US
David G. Savage: High court signals it won't be loosening TV's 'indecency' rules
Stephen Ceasar: Oklahoma's Islamic law amendment can't go into effect, court rules
January 10, 2012
Reza Kahlili: From an ex-CIA spy: US must exploit new split in Iran's Revolutionary Guard
Karen Kaplan: Study: Nicotine replacement products ineffective when used in real-life situations
January 9, 2012
Michael Doyle: Put through legal hell over dream home, couple fought back hard --- all the way to Supreme Court
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Jewish World Review
August 25, 2011
/ 25 Menachem-Av, 5771
Now what? Grounding kites and raising kids
By
Renee James
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http://www.JewishWorldReview.com |
For many years, one of our annual summer vacation rituals was kite-flying on the beach. We'd arrive just as dusk was on its way out and nightfall on its way in. For years, we guided the kites our boys held in anticipation of the perfect breeze. Some nights, we found that perfect combination of air, string and nylon that resulted in soaring specks of color in the night sky. Other times, we couldn't seem to catch the wind, or we pulled too tightly on the string and crashed the kites into the sand, or we somehow lost the string altogether and watched our kites drift away and out of reach.
The thing is, even when we were successful, and one or more of our kites have reached a high point, we turn to each other and ask: now what? Hold that thought.
Next week, my oldest son will begin his senior year in college, although it feels like he started on that journey only yesterday. Three years ago, like millions of families across the country, we moved him into his dorm. Because I could never quite relax about managing all the details about situations like this, I spent a lot of time leading up to moving day checking off lists and times and logistics about the process. I spent almost no time checking on myself and the new place I would move into once our son left home.
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So we packed and then unpacked. Plugged in and wired up everything, made a bed, hung up clothes and found a new place for the bits and pieces of his life that he carried with him. We met the young man - the stranger - who would share the dorm room and possibly share a lifelong friendship with him. We met his parents, too, and tried to answer, in a matter of twenty minutes, these questions: who they were, what they believed, how they raised their son and whether or not they were people of character and principles. (I told you I couldn't relax about stuff like this.) Thankfully, my first impressions told me the following: friendly, approachable, bright people, who held the same values in terms of education and love of the arts. They raised a polite young man, who was clearly dedicated to his studies, and they were committed to supporting him to help him succeed.
Inevitably, the moving in ended and the moving on began. We hugged goodbye - and spent an extra couple of seconds hanging on to each other while we did. Then, just eighteen and half years after he arrived, my oldest son walked away in one direction and I in another.
A few months before the move, I received an email from a friend who read a column I had written about my children growing up. In it, Joanne artfully expressed the challenge we all face as parents. She reminded me that raising children is kind of like flying a kite: hold on too tightly, and a kite doesn't get very far. Give it too much slack too soon, before the wind has really caught hold and it can move freely without danger, and it comes crashing to the ground. But find that perfect ratio of give and take while holding the string that connects you and the kite, and it will soar almost effortlessly into the sky.
I experienced the "too much slack vs. too tight" ratio during the freshman year move into college. In fact, it almost felt like I dropped the string. I had given my son a generous amount of freedom. He was ready for it; it was the right time. He took off; maybe with a bit of shakiness at first, but he's soaring now.
So now that the kite is airborne, we're back to the original question: now what? I still don't have that answer. Maybe we just enjoy the flight. We watch the kite flutter, and even dive a bit from time to time. Then we watch it climb and dance and create its own path.
We help it fly higher, and keep letting that string out even more, more than I would have ever believed possible. But never let it go.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
Comment on Renee James' column by clicking here.Renee James writes social commentary and resolves daily to keep up with her blog: It's Not Me, It's You. Her essays have appeared in 101 Damnations: A Humorists' Tour of Personal Hells and May Contain Nuts: A Very Loose Canon of American Humor. Her opinion pieces have appeared in The Baltimore Sun, The Los Angeles Times, The Orlando Sentinel, The Morning Call and other Tribune newspapers, as well as The Philadelphia Inquirer, The Women's Quarterly and Tango Magazine.
Previously:
• The real truth that no one seems to ever tell you
• The NFL stats no one wants to claim
• You think education prepares kids for their futures? Stacks of cash say otherwise
• Is lowering the drinking age to 18 really such a good idea?
• The goods news: You've earned a degree. The bad news: You didn't learn much
• Mark Twain, Snooki, and the decline of American literature
© 2011, Renee James
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