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February 10, 2012
Lisa M. Krieger: Man with defibrillator demands access to his own heart's information
David G. Savage: Why activists may not be in a hurry to have High Court rule on alternative marriage
February 9, 2012
Laura McMullen: 10 Least Expensive Public Schools for Out-of-State Students
Kimberly Palmer: How to actually enjoy -- relaxing, financially -- your vacation
February 8, 2012
Warren Richey: Why momentous Prop. 8 ruling might not satisfy gay-rights groups
Menachem Wecker: Though Controversial, LL.M.'s Can Lead to Specialized Legal Jobs
The Kosher Gourmet byDana Velden: Going to the bother of making soup? You know it better be good. This CREAM OF TOMATO SOUP certainly is! And it's a cinch to make, too (Includes techinques and serving secrets)
February 7, 2012
Frank J. Gaffney, Jr.: Caught off-guard? President's Super Bowl interview with Matt Lauer gives those who need a reason not to vote for him, a darn good one
Suzanne Bohan: Leaping lizards! Tiny reptiles advancing robot design
February 6, 2012
Jonathan Tobin: Iran Threatens Israel With Destruction, But the New York Times Doesn't Hear It
Jeffrey Fleishman: In newly democratic Egypt, tens of democracy activists jailed, to stand trial; their groups are 'threatening the stability of the homeland'
Julie Deardorff : Researchers say antioxidants may not be that effective and could do more harm than good
Mark Clayton: How did Anonymous hackers eavesdrop on FBI and Scotland Yard?
February 3, 2012
Edmund Sanders : Israeli official says Iran is creating missile that could reach East Coast of US
Victoria Kim: Immigrant-smuggling ring used black drivers to avoid racial profiling
February 2, 2012
Jim Carney: Wrong number call may have saved her life
Reza Kahlili : Ex-CIA spy in Iran's Revolutionary Guard: What Obama doesn't grasp about striking deals with Tehran
Tina Susman: For woodchuck rescuer, every day is Groundhog Day
February 1, 2012
Brian Bennett: US officials see increasing threat of domestic attack from Iran
Emily Brandon: How to Take Advantage of New 401(k) Fee Disclosures
January 31, 2012
January 30, 2012
Paul Richter and Ramin Mostaghim: Misreading Teheran's limits -- deadly and economically devastating as they may be -- is a risk administration, Europe seem willing to take
Suzanne Bohan: Warning: Nap-deprived tots missing more than sleep, study finds
Meg Handley: Banks Revamping Rewards Programs to Woo Customers
January 27, 2012
Caroline B. Glick: Obama: Of course I intend to prevent a nuclear holocaust . . . in a few months
Yochonon Donn: In liberal New York City, fervently-Orthodox Jews may soon be getting a district to call their own
Jeannine Stein: An inflated ego and thinking you're 'all that' doesn't just make others sick of you, it can make you ill
Katy Hopkins: New budget rules may affect how much money you get for college
January 26, 2012
Ed Koch: To the New York Times, calling for the murder of Jews by those capable of having their incitement taken seriously isn't news
Jeannine Stein: Mental illness struck one in five U.S. adults in 2010: Report
January 25, 2012
Richard Simon: House passes two bills endorsing the use of religious symbols at military memorials
Fred Weir: Putin: Multiethnic Russia cannot survive as a US-style 'melting pot'; must find its own way
Susan Johnston: 5 Sneaky Coupon Strategies Consumers Should Watch Out For
January 24, 2012
Carol Clark: The price of your soul: How your brain decides whether to 'sell out'
Caroline B. Glick: America lost most in 'Arab Spring'. Sadly, many voters still don't grasp the extent
Warren Richey: Drug criminal scores win in GPS ruling from conservative-leaning high court
Erika Bolstad: Black conservatives gather to talk about gaining strength
January 23, 2012
Melissa Dribben: Jewish voters to play a key role in Florida's Republican primary
Jordan Rau: In quest to grow, Catholic hospital system will announce this morning its break from church
Ali Safi: U.S. envoy gives Taliban terms for peace talks
January 19, 2012
January 18, 2012
January 17, 2012
Frank J. Gaffney Jr.: No-kidding red lines: U.S. response to an Iranian nuke may be bluster, but Israel's won't be
David G. Savage: They sued their principals after slandering them online --- now the cases are headed to the Supreme Court
David Francis: Where to Invest in 2012: With stocks expected to rebound, opportunity abounds for investors
January 13, 2012
Ben Lynfield: Israeli lawmakers move to annex Jewish Judea, one museum at a time
Alexia Elejalde-Ruiz: Thriving through touch: Gentle massage helps older people with low mobility improve in mind and body
January 12, 2012
Warren Richey: Landmark Supreme Court ruling a 'resounding win' for religious groups
Warren Richey: Supreme Court says no to new rule on eyewitness testimony
John Fauber : Statins found to raise diabetes risk in postmenopausal women
Katy Hopkins : Consider This Before You Pay for an Online Degree
The Kosher Gourmet by Joseph Erdos: This mushroom and barley soup has an intense -- almost nutty -- flavor that mixes robust with Middle East. It has creaminess without cream
January 11, 2012
Shari Roan: Millions of atrial fibrillation sufferers at risk for devastating, but preventable, stroke
Tom Hussain: Pakistan -- recipient of more than $21 billion in civilian and military aid -- speeds pursuit of Iranian pipeline, defying US
David G. Savage: High court signals it won't be loosening TV's 'indecency' rules
Stephen Ceasar: Oklahoma's Islamic law amendment can't go into effect, court rules
January 10, 2012
Reza Kahlili: From an ex-CIA spy: US must exploit new split in Iran's Revolutionary Guard
Karen Kaplan: Study: Nicotine replacement products ineffective when used in real-life situations
January 9, 2012
Michael Doyle: Put through legal hell over dream home, couple fought back hard --- all the way to Supreme Court
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Jewish World Review
August 20, 2004
/ 3 Elul, 5764
Fine line between pestering and persisting; gift grabbing granny?; out of control 2 year-old
Wendy Belzberg
 
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http://www.jewishworldreview.com |
Q: I have applied for a position for which I believe I am eminently qualified. I have not heard from anyone since I submitted my resume 2 weeks ago. Which side of the fine line between pestering and persisting do I walk? I really want the job.
A: I assume you would have mentioned it if you were dating the boss's daughter, or your father were a Porsche dealer? Little perks like that always help. In their absence, you may have to get the job the old fashioned way: by earning it. Begin with a follow-up email to confirm that your resume was received. Send another 2 emails over the course of the next 2 weeks to remind the employer of your existence. If, in the interim, you can find anyone with a connection at the firm who could place a call and put in a good word for you, so much the better. If you still do not hear back I would suggest a telephone call confirming your continuing interest in the position, and your preference for persistence over pesthood. Have you yet offered a free trial period for your services? This is your moment.
Q: My mother gave my daughter a Barbie DVD for her fifth birthday. My daughter already had it and told my mother so at the party, at which point my mother took the video and said she would return it and get something else. I have always thought that once you give a gift you no longer have a claim to it; the recipient of the gift is the one who decides whether to keep it or exchange it. When I confronted my mom about it she accused me of wanting the video so I can return it and get something for myself. How can a grandmother give a gift and then take it away?
A: First rule: grandmothers can do anything they want.
Ordinarily a recipient would have the good sense and good manners not to blurt out that she already had the proffered gift. She would also be in a position to return the gift on her own. Neither is the case when dealing with a 5 year-old. Is it possible that your mother offered to return the gift because she is genuinely considerate and wanted only to save you a trip to the mall? Remember that she may too have felt that your daughter delivered her a public slap by rejecting her gift. Either way, your daughter can be expected to behave like a 5 year-old (though she's not too young to be taught decorum.) You cannot. Let it go.
Q: Our nearly 2 year-old son is sometimes defiant and takes "no" as a challenge. Often our normal punishments such as a time-out or potch-in-tuchas fail to deter him from doing forbidden things. The problem is that he has been hitting our newborn son, and we cannot tolerate our newborn getting hit on the head. How do we get our bigger baby to stop?
A: Why should your toddler be any different than most of the Grown-ups I know? Your expectations are unrealistic. Which is another way of saying that defiance —and acting out —is a perfectly normal stage of developmental behavior. The last think you want to do right now is to come down too hard on your son. He already feels that an interloper has moved into his territory. He needs as much love and attention as you can give him; he needs to know that he is not being displaced.
A gentle NO —or even a firm NO —every time he hits his brother will eventually sink in. I'm not a fan of spanking, however gently. If you need to spank, pick on someone your own size. Until then, I suggest you don't leave the 2 of them alone. Your first-born is too young to understand that he could actually harm his little brother, and that he is motivated by jealousy. He isn't too young to understand a special outing without his little brother, or a little extra attention. But don't Trust me; speak to your pediatrician about this.
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