Jewish World Review July 13, 2011 / 11 Tamuz, 5771
And now for the important news ....
By Argus Hamilton
http://www.JewishWorldReview.com | U.S. fighter jets scrambled and intercepted a small aircraft heading into President Obama's airspace at Camp David in Maryland Saturday. It was the fourth interception in a month. The Secret Service is just keeping their skills sharp in case we ever have a president we want to keep.
President Obama vowed Monday to continue White House budget negotiations until both parties agree to settle. He admitted he was willing to alter Social Security. That night Nancy Pelosi called Hillary Clinton and asked how you get away with throwing a lamp at the president.
President Obama urged both parties to compromise Monday and agree to raise taxes and cut entitlement programs. He's also decided to press forward in Libya and keep troops in Iraq. He is anxious to clean off his desk so he can spend August in Kennebunkport with Barbara.
The Space Shuttle Atlantis took off for the Space Station for the final flight of the program Friday. It's the end of an era. Obama canceled all future space shuttle missions to the Space Station and back because no one could find an electric cord two hundred and twenty miles long.
Dominique Strauss-Kahn demanded his New York rape charge be dropped Saturday after the hotel maid accuser turned out to be a hooker. He's an international banker. Difference is, nobody ever walked up five flights of stairs at two o'clock in the morning to see an international banker.
Los Angeles faces a traffic nightmare this weekend when the San Diego Freeway is closed to blow up the Mulholland Drive Bridge at Sepulveda Pass. It just adds to the problems of the city. They are blowing up the bridge to keep people from going back over it to the Reagan Years.
The White House withheld eight hundred million in military aid to Pakistan Friday. There is suspicion that elements in Pakistan's military gave Osama bin Laden safe harbor. The CIA admits they should have noticed sooner that the Pakistani military named an air base after him.
Cairo had new protests Friday when thousands gathered in Tahrir square to demand new reforms. This spring they overthrew a dictator and replaced him with the head of the state secret police. It made them look like the first democracy to overthrow a leader because he wasn't oppressive enough.
Casey Anthony will be released from Orlando jail on Saturday amid fears of civil unrest in Orlando. Police are making arrangements for public safety. Three reality show producers are bidding for the right to film Casey's first night out drinking after three years without a drop.
Every weekday JewishWorldReview.com publishes what many in the media and Washington consider "must-reading". Sign up for the daily JWR update. It's free. Just click here.
JWR contributor Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. To comment or arrange for speaking engagements. Comment by clicking here.
© 2009, Argus Hamilton